Pursuing natural health & thinking beyond the superficial. Deconstructing Culture.

6 July 2016 is International Kissing Day or World Kiss Day. The idea behind the International Kissing Day is that many people may have forgotten the simple pleasures associated with kissing for kissing’s sake, as opposed to kissing as mere social formality or prelude to other activities. Kissing can be an enjoyable experience in and of itself. It is an expression and experience of intimacy. International Kissing Day is not as commercialized as Valentine’s Day.

A kiss is the act of pressing one’s lips against the lips or other body parts of another. Cultural connotations of kissing vary widely. A kiss may be used to express sentiments of love, passion, affection, respect, greeting, friendship, and good luck, among many others. The word came from Old English cyssan “to kiss”, in turn from coss “a kiss”. The act of kissing has become a common expression of affection among many cultures worldwide. (From: Wikipedia)

A kiss is a strange thing; everyone knows what it is, animals know a kiss is a mark of affection (as well as knowing how to play ‘it’/’tag’ and ‘hide ‘n’ seek’) so if you kiss them it makes them feel happy, loved, secure etc, like if you do a forehead-to-forehead or nose-to-nose gentle touch. Humans however (and some species of other animal too, both ‘lower’ and ‘higher’) have made such a simple expression of love more complicated, is that really so surprising? A kiss, a hug, a handshake have so many variations and can mean so many things. If only it were simple again. A kiss (on the mouth, hence rarely done by some people) can even be a contract or sign of a significant bond whereas they’d kiss you any/everywhere else without/without much hesitation.

People are so… Hypocritical. A kiss can be ‘light’, ‘meaningless’, ‘casual’ like a greeting, made even moreso if an air kiss so don’t you ruin each other’s makeup (celebrities) *rolleyes*. As a greeting it can also be overdone *looks at some Europeans* and seem far too forward, especially if they grab your head at the same time.

There’s been a couple of times in my life where some very unusual people kissed me on the forehead to tell me well done and everything will be ok, but time and distance erode away at that feeling. Faith is a very difficult thing to have for some, and easy for others. Hope is an emotion that is easier to get into people but is also easier to break in the short term. Both emotions need to be consistently re-affirmed/bolstered by Charity/Kindness/Generosity because they’re both so fragile yet enduring, for better or worse. The problem with all of these virtues? Trust, or lackthereof. How is it earned, how is it lost, how long does it take to gain, how easily is it lost, is the bond strong enough to endure? Everything is subject to use and abuse, knowingly and unknowingly.

What can we do in these short but seemingly long moments we have that we call life? Let it all in, keep it all out? Hide? Use others so they can’t hurt you? The strongest, most knowing, most powerful of us can’t keep a balance of it just like anybody else. Some people are so lucky, they barely know any loss in their lives, or they’re able to deal with it relatively easily, the endings weren’t even unhappy, morelike it was the right time and so holding on would have been injurious and impractical. So they get to be grateful and move on. I really like ‘naturally happy’ people and I know other ‘negative’ people who feel the same way, we like and feel protective over them, not wanting them to feel the way we do in the slightest bit because it’s ‘not right for them’, it’s not right for anybody but somehow even less natural for happy-go-lucky and/or simple/straightforward/optimistic people. Obviously the problem is when those people expect us to be happy, we don’t expect them to be happy all the time, but expecting us to be like them? Hmm πŸ™‚ The moments we laugh or are happy are followed by pain and the object of happiness hurt or taken away. That’s life? No it’s orchestration, resentment, jealousy.

Recently I was refreshing my memory on the ‘Milabs’ experiments in the USA done to people that ruined their lives, their futures, destined to affect everybody they ever come into contact with/are close with, to constantly control the subjects in every way and keep them in constant confusion. To create their personalities and alter them at will; their beliefs, their feelings, the predilections. To use their ‘experiences’ to learn more about human and ‘superhuman/enhanced human’ nature. One aspect of this program/ming was love; especially what I call the ‘lost husband/wife/partner even child’ complex (that you also see often in fairytales). In a basic relatable way it’s somewhat comparable to advertising (and the billions spent on it, how to make it more pervasive, analysis, patterns, better technology to the point of hypnotic levels) and how many people have a criteria of what their ideal partner would be like e.g. ‘successful’, rich, have some kind of stable property assets or potential for it/them, good looking, funny, monogamous or not minding of promiscuity, whatever… The list, order and number of attributes changes depending on your age and circumstance but the basic components are there. Many of those components/aspects are ‘guided’ by our intake of media even moreso than looking at the experience of those around us. We’re especially predisposed/impressionable in our teen years, we’re vulnerable and more trusting before that but in our teens we think we have more control over our identity – that we’re picking and choosing, and indeed doing so with more discernment. That mental state is very easy to take advantage of. If for whatever reason we start (in those years) to think, believe or even know that we’ve lost someone who was very close to us in the past (and it can be based on true event(s)) then that feeling can last a long time, far into our adult years if it leaves us at all. Many or even every romance and/or sex based relationship we make afterwards can be affected if not the product of that, a bit like a rebound but worse, a kind of seeking, to fill a space that may never have been there in the first place, artificially put there. Why would scientists, researchers, psychologists, psychiatrists, sociologists, weapon makers, governments etc want this kind of sadism and torture? If you’ve spent time watching and/or grooming someone, if you’ve invested in them, would you let them go? Putting people in your life that fit a description of the person you’re ‘looking for’/’lost’ compromises you, whether the ‘plant’/mole/replacement knows it or not. The ‘lost one’ can be more than a ‘tool’ to persuade you, they can be a punishment, a painful reminder but if they really love you, how can you possibly overcome all of that?

Many people talk about ‘twin flames’ – something I never really understood or liked the idea of and so many people use it, not all of them are ‘Milab-ed’, not at all, people just pick up what they want to use as a buzzword to feel special like ‘Indigo’, ‘Violet’, ‘Rainbow’, ‘Black eyed’ children. I was a briefly on an ‘alternative news’ public forum of one the most prominent alternative news figures in this country and popular worldwide, he was intending to start a ‘movement’ of intelligent, discerning, capable people and as usual I just found all the same personalities and behaviours that you always get in group dynamics – there was a thread about Indigo children and everybody claimed to be one or their children were one/them, only two people said they weren’t/didn’t think they were and asked more about what being an Indigo child means – I was one of those two people and obviously we were ignored by the masses of people too busy proclaiming how wonderful and special they are. And let me just say I don’t think, believe or know of masses of aliens incarnating on this planet to ‘help’ humanity – not at all. Most of the unseen are already here, from here, trapped here. Why would they touch this place with a barge pole, the Guantanamo Bay of the area, toxic waste dump, ridiculously tiered ‘pleasure island’ with proud monarchs/rulers of the trash heap with populations of despair, depression, depravity and destitution? Proud of what other than their ability to desecrate and own everything, who wants to be Queen/King of the Garbage Dump? It’s one thing to live in a trash can and still care/look out for others, it’s another to lord it up over the place like it’s something to aspire to. That doesn’t mean we’re alone in space, a highly arrogant thing to think, but that masses of benevolent and even malevolent species are stampeding over each other to get/be here, give up their lives/homes/loved ones/’things’/places and ‘enjoy’/learn the experience of poverty, stress, amnesia and chaos? To potentially lose oneself, even never return? To take the edge off/share the suffering of some ok, but en masse? There’s more than enough people and ‘people’ here to better each other and have had plenty of time to do so, but it hasn’t happened, repeatedly.

Anyway some people saw my looking at the ‘Milab’ information as an opportunity for a bit of an intimidation ritual shakedown; to claim I’m lost, alone and helpless – please, as if I’m not strong enough to have put up with their sh*t all this time. Unfortunately for them I’ve begun to understand the meaning of ‘twin flame’ and they hate that, it worries them. The idea of someone rebellious with assistance is scary. A ‘twin flame’ doesn’t have to be romantic and/or sexual but it often is, and it’s often abused – think about what all those singers singing about dream lovers are really implying for example. It’s not just a trap on a ‘physical’ level. Losing someone you love on any level whether family, friend, lover, colleague or any bond can feel like it’s forever ripped a part of you away let alone adding the idea of ‘destiny’ – someone who you’re destined to be with, or someone you were with who has returned – to the mix. The problem for targeted people is that they’re sensitive, more empathetic, more aware and intelligent – they have both intellectual and emotional intelligence/ability – so compiled upon the ‘average’ person’s need to belong, need for approval, understanding and trust – the idea of someone who these people can trust is more dangerous/precarious to them. Not enough ‘average’ people know or understand the value of solitude and being comfortable with ourselves, we’re often reaching out, but who else is reaching out, reaching back? Connections are very important; some of us can do the recluse/hermit thing really well (kudos, respect, I don’t blame them, I know I could if left to my own devices but at the same time couldn’t ignore those who can’t) and those who do it best tend to be the best trained, most in the know like exclusive priest castes/disciples/teachers/masters but unless under attack they also have better conditions to do so.

That doesn’t mean there aren’t or haven’t been ‘family groups’ i.e. people and ‘people’ who travel together over many years or meet each other again, some people think of them as ‘soul groups’. You don’t always have to get on, the bond or even ‘clinging’ has to be strong enough. Real love in my opinion however is irreplaceable, you can add to it, even lose/think you lose it over time until something brings it all back to the forefront of your mind and feelings again, but you can’t replace it. You can fool yourself, others can fool you and for a long time but do those situations work out? Are you ever really happy together? And yet, can it work out, can you be happy together even if you do really love each other whilst in a bad situation? Can you risk letting each other go, and perhaps finding each other again at some other time? Those phrases “it’s worth the risk” “better to have lost and lost than never have loved at all” etc? It’s not as easy or shallow as that, especially if its making you less and less of yourself each time.

Another problem is passion and how much of it and when. Sexual abuse is in no way limited to programs/experiments and ‘going too far’ is more normal for some than others throughout history and culture. Also bear in mind that controlling someone via sex is very effective and if added to via emotional push/pull a very potent cocktail. What if you could be controlled remotely as well in some way like a distance bodylink? Sounds a bit like vodou doesn’t it (much of which is in your face intimidation/psyche out methods to cause fear, panic and hysteria – the religion it comes from Vodun is interesting) but at least vodoo is in your face, you know where you stand/kind of know what you’re up against. Sexual abuse in one form or another is very common, more than most would probably care to acknowledge or care about at all; ritual sex abuse is also common, mind control/archetype creation is another area, both technologically and in cultural stories (in those stories usually done by some non-human ‘other being’) through taking advantage of someone’s base chakra/sex drive/genitalia. Heck sex drive can be increased via undisciplined exercise, eating too much, consuming low quality food/drinks, medicines, let alone being bombarded with ‘sexual emancipation’ and advertising. That doesn’t make us all sex crazed out of control people, but it slowly makes behaviours more common, justifiable and less noticeable; with extremes like sex addiction or thinking about it too much and the opposite e.g. repressing it too much and covering people head to toe becoming more normal as well as blaming the victim whilst wanting them to meet the lustful requirements e.g. society pushes you to be hot and sexy and then if you’re abused think about all the people you know and come across, most commonly in a group of 3 – 1 of those people will think it’s your fault, will blame you, may even come down on you like a ton of bricks. Out of 6 people, 2 of them will do that. Out of 9, that will be 3 people. How many in a crowded room, in your workplace, in your family, on the street? How clautrophobic will you feel? Can you handle that? Why should even have to. Any society where we have to and should take precautions like self defense, going out in numbers, letting someone know where you’re going etc is a society where sexual abuse is considered a big enough risk, whether from strangers, at night, in ‘shady’ areas, from people you know, even from people you love or think you love. And yet in those societies you’re still likely to get blamed, not necessarily stoned to death but still victimized further then you already have been. Some of the gang bully b*tches I used to work with talked about one woman who’d been raped and then good heavens dared to go back to that place/use that place as part of her route instead of it scaring her off ever going there again “[rape] well it’s not nice [not sounding very convincing/I really don’t give a sh*t because it hasn’t happened to me and it’s unlikely to], but how stupid was she to go back there, obviously it happened again, you can’t really blame the [rapist] that much, it’s her fault too.” I interjected “two of you have daughters, if that happened to anyone I knew, let alone someone so close I know what I would do to them in this life and I’d put them through rebirth just to punish them again”. That shut them up because as [still low level but high enough to screw with a person even long after they’re out of their field] masons/wannabes they knew enough to think they own who they want and can do what they want, when they want and apparently it won’t happen to them (yet they’ll expect to learn ‘the answers’ of life, death and the universe from you).

It’s hard enough for many people let alone hurt people and mucked about with people to trust others, to take that leap of faith and to some its just reckless and whilst I’ll always be cautious yet innocently trusting to a degree (hey I’m a free spirited kind of person, can’t help it *sigh*), I’ve learned this year that whilst there’s always someone trying/pretending to ‘help’ there is at least someone truly wanting/trying to rescue you. No matter how it seems like the opposite for how long, just like I’ve been trying to do for others, others are trying for you. It’s done in different ways, and sadly not always personal unless you have something ‘special’ or something to ‘offer’, sometimes it’s just for you and not those you love, maybe there’s a time limit on the ‘offer’, but maybe once in a lifetime it’s real. The problem is you never know who to trust or for how long, what they’ll be subjected to or if they’ll be betrayed. A chain is only so strong as its weakest link(s). Is a ring/bond/kiss binding/healing enough?

This is a well thought out outside-looking-in (or well many are inside-telling-out-but-confusingly-twistedly) view of the issues above including the manipulation of memory/ies.

‘Read or Die’ also known as ‘R.O.D the TV’ (2003-4, and bear in mind what ‘rod’, ‘the rod(s)’ is/are in masonic symbolism and titles), could also be called ‘Live or Die’ or as stated within the show ‘Dream or Die’. This is the episode where ‘it’ all really kicks off and gets ‘deep’ but the whole series is well done and there’s a ton of poignant quotes. Not an easy watch for the sensitive, sympathetic or empathetic and/or with experience of the above. So many people can take all this ‘drama’ media in their stride, so much of it they find ‘interesting’ and ‘entertaining’, a joke, something to deride, put beneath them and then who do they expect help/knowledge from when shtf? Selfish bastards. Remember it’s not always in your best interest to forget, there’s a difference between forgetting and healing, and doctoring and healing.

Read or Die – Episode 12

To a certain someone – if you ever need me, just call or better yet scream. I get stuck in places too but if you call my name I’ll hear you, it’ll jolt me at least and I’ll be better able to find you since I’ve already found you three times before and you found this blog. I need and get assistance too nowadays but getting to you would be a good refresher/practise for me since I’m out of shape. You called me “prizefighter” afterall. Those things/demons/personal demons you face day in and day out; they’re not the be all and end all, they’re beneath/work for some of us. That scaly bunch aren’t the top of the pyramid. People were made in the image of something/one else hence the desirability of the human female form.

To someone else, whilst there are things I’ll never allow, want or even need, will never forgive nor want to change, my love is certainly not unconditional (and neither is yours) but you’re more than man enough to accept, workaround, ‘manage’ (not control/handler style) and be ok with those and although my ‘script’ shows that I never/rarely touch the person I love (in practise that has meant long distance and certain restrictions when meeting) I still ‘wish’ the person I was with at the time of the pics below had been you. I’m not a parent nor wannabe parent, never want to be but I wasn’t against marriage/a marriage-like relationship, I just don’t have the energy or willingness anymore though. Shame I don’t have pics of any of my fave outfits over the years. Goddess I was cute back then :-), nowhere near a match for your looks πŸ™‚ nowadays. I was definitely wasted on those two before. I’m glad you and yours found me.

Billie Myers – Kiss the Rain

Madonna – Rain

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