Pursuing natural health & thinking beyond the superficial. Deconstructing Culture.

Posts tagged ‘Freemasonry’


Someday my Prince will come, Not. Breaking the Chain.

I don’t remember the years between 5 and 9/10 years old but afterwards I suffered major hairloss and wrote a song called ‘Amnesiac’. Other than the memories below the only other memories potentially between this time are of pain such as falling on glass, concussions, falling off a bike, swallowing paint, head getting stuck in a bannister, being locked outside, hiding for hours, burning hand, broken arm, being beaten in the back with a stiletto shoe, a steel ruler etc. Most of them I remember as accidents.

Then there was house I used to stay at every weekend, she was formerly a neighbour and had moved quite a distance but came to collect me anyway. The last time I stayed there she had friends over, it turned into a party and all I remember is hitting something behind me (probably furniture) as I slumped into unconsciousness and saw her friends laughing at me like hyenas. Shortly after at school every one in my year had to be ‘checked’, we each individually went into one of the assembly halls and our parent(s)/guardian(s) waited outside. In the hall were a group of adults seated at tables and we had to strip down to our underwear and present ourselves as well as pull our underwear down a little. Apparently they were looking for signs of abuse and that there had been a report of domestic violence but one of people from the party was on the panel.

My earliest memory was at 5 years old, and according to child psychology that’s pretty late for children; I remember being in a car and seeing lights go past (night time) and my dad being there or a father figure. Apparently it was a family outing but I don’t remember anyone else there except him and I. We were going to see Cinderella (1950 Disney version) at the local cinema but it wasn’t re-released that year… I’ve always wondered what it meant and that if it was a type of story/fantasy programming why wasn’t it the usual Oz stories, Alice in Wonderland (had elements of that in my life) or the Narnia Chronicles.

Cinderalla and the ash ‘cinders’ girls stories in general are obviously based on kindness (including kindness to animals), subservience with gratitude/grace built in to those who are greedy and ruthless, punishment (for what?) and reward, and rising again like a phoenix to royalty (as if royalty is any better) but through marriage. (Thankfully I’ve gotten rid of the ‘lost partner’ complex as I wrote about HERE in many fairytale programmings.) This was later reinforced by the book ‘Pamela: Or Virtue Rewarded’ (1740) by Samuel Richardson – the story basically shows her gaining status and respect by marrying into a higher class to the man who tried to/did rape her. However in that story Pamela is a resilient character who stands her ground whereas Cinderella is portrayed as unquestioning (though not in the Grimm’s version, explained later).


Excerpt from: http://www.vox.com/2015/3/15/8214405/cinderella-fairy-tale-history

Disney didn’t invent Cinderella. Her story is at least 2,000 years old.

Updated by Kelsey McKinneykelsey@vox.com Mar 15, 2015, 12:00pm EDT

There are two faces to Cinderella: there’s the European folk tale that evolved into the modern-day story of a girl in a big blue ball gown, and there’s the centuries-old plot that has been passed between cultures for millennia.

The story of overcoming oppression and marrying into another social class to be saved from a family that doesn’t love or appreciate you is an incredibly powerful one, too powerful to be contained by the story we all know. At the center of most Cinderella stories (whether they use that name for their protagonist or not) is one thing: a persecuted heroine who rises above her social station through marriage.

The first recorded story featuring a Cinderella-like figure dates to Greece in the sixth century BCE. In that ancient story, a Greek courtesan named Rhodopis has one of her shoes stolen by an eagle, who flies it all the way across the Mediterranean and drops it in the lap of an Egyptian king.

Taking the shoe drop as a sign from the heavens (literally and metaphorically), the king goes on a quest to find the owner of the shoe. When he finds Rhodopis, he marries her, lifting her from her lowly status to the throne.

Another one of the earliest known Cinderella stories is the ninth-century Chinese fairy tale Ye Xian, in which a young girl named Ye Xian is granted one wish from some magical fishbones, which she uses to create a gown in the hopes of finding a husband.

Like Rhodopis’ tale, a monarch comes in possession of the shoe (this time, the shoes have a gold fish-scale pattern) and goes on a quest to find the woman whose tiny feet will fit the shoe. Ye Xian’s beauty convinces the king to marry her, and the mean stepmother is crushed by stones in her cave home.

The European version of the story originated in the 17th century

In total, more than 500 versions of the Cinderella story have been found just in Europe, and the Cinderella we know best comes from there (France, specifically).

The first version of Cinderella that bears a significant similarity to the most famous version emerged in the 17th century, when a story called Cenerentola was published in a collection of Italian short stories. Cenerentola has all the ingredients of the modern-day tale — the wicked stepmother and stepsisters, the magic, and the missing slipper — but it’s darker and just a bit more magical.

In the story, a woman named Zezolla escapes the king, who wants to marry her, at two separate celebrations — before he finally catches her at the third one and prevents her from leaving. Instead of a story of requited love, Cenerentola is a story of forced marriage and six very wicked stepsisters.

Sixty years later, the Italian tale got a French twist and became the story we know. In Cendrillon, Charles Perrault — a French writer credited with inventing the fairy tale — cast the form that Cinderella would take for the next 400 years. He introduced the glass slipper, the pumpkin, and the fairy godmother (minus the bibbidi bobbidi boo). This is the version Disney later adapted into its animated classic.

The Brothers Grimm had a, well, grimmer take on the tale

The Brothers Grimm also collected the tale in their famous fairy tale compendium. That story, called Aschenputtel (Cinderella in the English translations), appeared more than 100 years after Perrault’s version in the 19th century.

Aschenputtel is a much darker tale. Cinderella’s wishes come not from a fairy godmother but from a tree growing on her mother’s grave. Her father, instead of being absent as in Perrault’s tale, is willfully ignorant of his daughter’s suffering.

In the Grimm version, the heroine’s slippers are made of gold (not glass), and when the Prince comes to test the stepsisters’ feet for size, one of them cuts off her own toes to try and make the shoe fit [My comment: how very Chinese]. In the end, Cinderella marries the prince, her stepsisters serve as her bridesmaids, and doves peck their eyes out during the ceremony. It is, needless to say, a beautiful tale for children.

For more information on Asian versions of the story look here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cinderella

Exerpt from: https://www.bustle.com/articles/61053-9-things-about-the-original-brothers-grimm-cinderella-story-that-are-nothing-like-the-disney-version

By JR Thorpe Jan 29 2015

9 Things About The Original Brothers Grimm Cinderella Story That Are Nothing Like The Disney Version

1. Cinderella is exactly the opposite of helpless.

Aschenputtel (remember, that’s Cinderella’s name in their version) doesn’t mope about. She sorts everything out herself, and considering that her pragmatism involves a magic tree, some enchanted birds, and the apparent ability to disappear, it seems that she isn’t actually an emotionally neglected kitchen maid, but a talented witch.

2. She is also seriously good at hiding.

The Grimm Brothers’ prince insists on accompanying his newfound love home, to see who the hell she is. (Twice, mind you, since there are actually three balls in the original story.) Aschenputtel has to hide in a pigeon coop and up a pear tree until he goes away. And she isn’t found. Good work.

3. The ‘fairy’ godmother is really just a tree growing on her dead mother’s grave.

The godmother’s not a fairy, or even a person. In Aschenputtel’s version, Cinderella’s father asks what he can get her on a business trip, and she asks for a simple twig (the stepsisters ask for gold and pearls, because they’re not maudlin hippies). She then plants it on her mother’s grave and waters it with her tears. Said tree grows up to give her whatever she wants: the dresses are just the latest incarnation. Aschenputtel is clearly powerful as hell, so why she wants to marry some dude who chases her into a pigeon coop is beyond me.

4. The stepmother has a peculiar obsession with lentils.

Aschenputtel’s stepmother throws first one, then two cups of lentils into the ash and tells Aschenputtel that if she can pull them all out, she can come to the ball. Aschenputtel manages it, which I will explain momentarily, but I still don’t know why she didn’t ask the tree to throw down a sword and just chase the lentil-hater around the garden. [My comment: reminds me of a Caribbean of African folktale about tricking a particular type of demoness by making her count rice and she has to finish before sunrise.]

5. “Fit into the shoe” actually means “cut off bits of your feet.”

None of this wimpy “my foot doesn’t fit” stuff for the Grimms. To fit her into the tiny golden slipper, one of her sisters cuts off her big toe, the other a bit of her heel. Their plans are foiled by the blood everywhere (which surely somebody must have thought about), but hey, points for trying.

6. Cinderella has some seriously badass birds as minions.

The birds are basically Aschenputtel’s soldiers: they pluck all of her lentils out of the ashes, eating the bad ones and putting all the good ones in the pot. But they’re not cheery little singing friends.

When her stepsisters cut off their body parts to fit into the slipper, the birds tell on them, by twice sitting in the Hazel Tree of Death and singing a peppy song to the prince about how the slipper of his stepsister-bride is filling with blood.

And then, once they’ve guaranteed their witchy mistress’s ascension to the throne via marriage, they find the stepsisters in the church and peck out their eyes. (More on that in a moment.)

7. The father has a strong destructive streak.

Aschenputtel’s dad’s not dead, as he was in the Disney film; instead he’s still around and being a nuisance. When the prince turns up at his door, not once but twice, with a story about a girl hiding in various bits of his property, he doesn’t call the police — he, wondering if the girl could be Aschenputtel, gets an axe and chops whatever it is down. Pigeon coop? Smashed. Beautiful pear tree filled with fruit? Kindling.

Let me remind you that he does this while thinking his daughter might be inside. She should have got her birds to make her a boat and floated the hell away from that madhouse.

8. The prince is a predator [my comment: and hunter] with a mysterious-princess-trap.

I have to give Aschenputtel’s prince credit for at least having a personality. Admittedly he does chase her into chicken coops, but he also, after the third ball, he lays a trap: he smears the palace steps with pitch so that she leaves her golden shoe behind. Smart man. (Though he then fails to notice said shoe filling with blood until some magic birds tell him.)

9. The stepsisters end up getting horribly blinded.

The Grimm stepsisters are truly awful, and get a truly awful comeuppance. You know how I said they were blinded? Here’s how that goes down: they want so badly to get the reflected glory of Aschenputtel’s royal wedding that they accompany her up the aisle, at which the birds peck one eye out. But they still want it so badly that they accompany her back down the aisle, and the birds promptly peck out the other eye. Respect.

I’ve just been refreshing my memory about jewel stones and colours in masonic training as well as the gems/colours for the tribes of Isreal (and astrology) when I found some interesting comparable parables in the bible:


Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Is There a Cinderella Story in the Bible?

Someone came to this blog the other day looking for the answer to the question Is there a Cinderella story in the Bible? The answer to that is yes and no. It depends on exactly what aspects of the Cinderella story you are referring to. No, you won’t find a maiden with a fairy godmother who transforms her into a princess, but yes, there are some stories that have similarities to the Cinderella story.

Consider the life of Joseph. His father loved Joseph, but his step-brothers hated him. They hated him so much that they threw him in a pit and would have killed him had not he older brother suggested they sell him instead. He was taken to Egypt and sold as a slave and eventually ended up in prison. But he had the gift of prophesy and he foretold of a great famine. The king was so convinced by Joseph that he put him in charge of preparing the land for a long period with few crops, making him a rule of the land. Joseph’s brothers came when they needed food and bowed before him.

Or consider Ruth. After her husband died, she went with her mother-in-law to her mother-in-law’s home land. Being poor, she gathered grain the reapers left in the fields of a wealthy farmer. He fell for Ruth and told the reapers to leave more behind for her than they normally would have. There’s even a shoe involved in this story.

The story of Esther is that of a maiden who marries a king.

David has a Cinderella-like story. Of his brothers, he was considered the most unlikely person to become king, but upon the direction of God, Samuel anointed him to be the king who would replace Saul.

And what about every gentile who has ever been saved by the grace of God? We were no better than dogs, but we have been made kings and priests. So, is there a Cinderella story in the Bible? Absolutely.



by Charles Robey
(Trussville AL)

In Luke 15:1-7, we find Jesus telling the parable of the Lost Sheep. Jesus asks, “What man upon you would not leave ninety-nine sheep, in the open pasture, and go search for the one sheep that was lost?” Like the lost wearer of the Golden Slipper, Jesus emphasizes the lost state of man.

As the Kingdom Prince had faith that he would find eternal peace, by finding his new found love, through the perfect fit of the glass slipper, so also may mankind, by way of faith, have eternal peace through God’s redemptive power.

“For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, that no one should boast.” (Ephesians 2:8-9)

I found this one particularly interesting: Bear in mind that El e.g. Elle or Ella or Ellie/y goes back to the Mother Goddess Lalita in ‘Hinduism’ but has become masculanized in the later Abrahamic religions.


Cinderalla, The Story of Redemption.

Cinderella -Who are you? John Bull
Where are you? March 2001 East
The story is Centuries old. Tribes # 3

Hosea 1:10 “Yet the number of the children of Israel shall be as the sand of the sea, which cannot be measured nor numbered; and it shall come to pass, that in the place where it was said unto them, (USA & world) Ye are not my people, there it shall be said unto them, Ye are the sons of the living God.” The Jews are no longer his people.

Matthew 21; 43 “Therefore say I unto you, (Jews) The kingdom of God shall be taken from you, and given to a nation bringing forth the fruits thereof.” (USA)

This will be about Cinderella, and who the Prince will choose. If you want to learn, then you will have to un-learn all of your traditions.
You go to College to learn. And to do well you have to study.

“Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.” 2 Timothy 2:15

Some people are: “Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.”
2 Timothy 3:7

The ‘Signs’ are here now, and it is Midnight for Cinderella! And tomorrow God is really going to clean house. CLICK HERE to see the “Signs.”

You have been asleep just like the 10 virgins waiting for the bridegroom in Matthew Chapter 25 When the Prince comes will your foot fit into the slipper. Like Cinderella’s did?

Because you’re wise, now we will talk about Cinderella. (Don’t laugh because I said you are wise.

You are smart enough to read here, when others just scoff at me like 2 Peter 3:3 said would happen.)

There really is a Prince coming, (Matthew 25) and there will be a wedding, with the Bride of Christ. Some people think that the bride is the church, but they are asleep. The Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6) is coming for Israel. (Not the Jews, or the church, but true Israel!) CLICK HERE to learn of Israel.

As the story goes, Ella’s mother had died and her father had remarried a woman with two daughters, and then had to go away on a long journey. While he was gone, bad things happened.

Jesus spoke of it in Matthew 25:14-15, 28-34

Ella was treated as a servant girl in her own house. You will remember that Israel was the servant to Pharaoh in Egypt. She had to clean the fireplace and carry out all the ashes from the fires. They gave her the name that fit her “Cinder-Ella.” Because of the cinders in her hair and clothes.

Remember that before her father had left on his trip he asked what each person wanted him to bring back, as a gift for each of them.

The two stepdaughters asked for dresses, pearls, jewels. Ella asked for a ‘branch’ that she could plant to remember, and so honor her mother.

(“Zion” God even calls a city after her honor, the city of Zion. Just as we do naming Susanville, Marysvale, Virginia City, and a thousand other cities with women’s names in honor of them.

Even in our time “trees” are planted in the remembrance of people who have died.)

Ezekiel 31 speaks of ‘trees’ as people, and nations. And the ‘trees’ in Eden, or Eden people.

Isaiah 10: 12-20 speaks of the ‘fruit’ of the king of Assyria. And the axe and the saw,
and ‘trees’ of his forest shall be few. Eve got some bad, ‘fruit’ from the ‘tree’ in Eden.

The story of Cinderella portrays her plainly as the bride of Christ.

No other people than Israel who was cast off, and migrated into the North countries, as your European ancestors did sit by the fireplace to warm themselves and cook. Today we all like to cuddle up in front of a good fire. There we watch cinders go up the chimney.

Just like Ella did. And wait for Jesus Christ,

The Prince, The King, to come save us.

The expression comes from “Cinderella’s lost glass slipper.” Remember when she fled the grand ball, (dance) the Prince chased her and she lost her glass slipper. So why was it “glass”, instead of pretty red shoes that most women want.

The Prince searched the realm for the maiden whose foot fit into the “glass” slipper. The only foot that did fit was Cinderella. When she put it on, and the fit was perfect, she pulled the other “glass” slipper out of her pocket and put it on to have the matched pair on her feet.

Revelation tell us why they were “glass” slippers. Now can you get revelation about it?
I will quote it for you: “Revelation 4: 6 And before the throne there was a sea of “glass” like unto crystal: and in the midst of the throne, and round about the throne, were four beasts full of eyes before and behind. [My comment: the so-called ultimate ‘gods’ of post-Vedic Hinduism have been described and depicted as part of the throne of Lalita as they are nothing but workers (traitors) beneath her in hierarchy. The image is also used in Freemasonry:

Which is exactly how this writer describes the Wicked Stepmother and step-sisters; remember the Scarlet woman in never a good thing in the bible but it has been twisted from older cultures where they were priestesses (and not prostitutes).]

Cinderella’s all over the world wait for the Prince. Everyone will wear soot and ashes before the wedding.    You can read all about it on my other pages.    Nuclear War Comes.

Cinderella’s all over the world wait for the Prince. Everyone will wear soot and ashes before the wedding. You can read all about it on my other pages… There is a lot more to tell you about Cinderella in the future. If you can live to see, the morning come. Don’t be late, or be sorry. If the blind are leading you, then your headed for the ditch.

What about when the Prince is a masculanized version of the Princess/Daughter? Just as most of the male avatars have been.

Her glass slippers remind me of Dorothy’s original Silver slippers (also representing diamond, crystal, glass) turned Ruby Red (lesser class) for the film and obviously since I’ve learned that Cinderella’s were also Gold (Grimm’s version).

And why does Cinderella (like the book ‘Pamela: Or Virtue Rewarded’ (1740) by Samuel Richardson) always have to be accepted by a ‘prince’/’saviour’ figure. Reminds me of Julia Roberts and Richard Gere in ‘Pretty Woman’ (1990) where they show prostitutes are people too, are raped and need to be saved; and then together again they starred in ‘Runaway Bride’ (1999) about a woman who just can’t bring herself to get married until she meets a man determined enough to save/marry her.

I prefer the versions of Cinderella where she does the saving like in ‘Ever After: A Cinderella Story’ (1998) starring Drew Barrymore.


Since 2013 when we broke away from a masonic situation (e.g. a recruitment agent who would call me as soon as I got back from holiday leave abroad even though I wouldn’t tell her my flight times, but schedule going back to work a day or two after yet she’d still call me as soon as I got back to a UK airport) we were followed and re-conctact and reinforcement programming/gang stalking continued (e.g. the day after we moved into a new place there were footsteps all around the property in the snow, especially around the windows and up and down the garden alongside what looked like a the prints of a machine and a message on the window. No one else had any footprints around there properties and from the looks of the road the person(s) came straight to ours. There’s tons of incidents like that).

The book described below is 17 years old but many if the techniques are still the same, the information people are lacking is about Virtual Reality which is where this book ends. Everything else I knew in the book already, the author writes about these things happening to children but it can happen to adults too though it usually starts and can continue into adulthood. Most recently I’ve been particularly reminded of being made close to someone and them deliberately betraying you, expect you to forgive them, cause confusion and then want you to act as if nothing happened/even be dependent on them and taking credit if you manage to get through the experience.


The author is spot on when they say it takes years of programming (and indeed times in a persons life where at the end of a cycle it needs to be renewed) and hence can take years of therapy with someone used to such situations to try to heal.

Next Post:
Feast of the Beast – Bride/Sacrifice of the beast, rescued.


Make Your Dream Come True Day – Fri the 13th – Happy New Year

Friday the 13th – i.e. Auspicious. And 13 = Kali. I can’t remember if I’ve spelled this out before for all the Masons who forget their owned damned twisted crap (so they can untwist) and all the non-Masons with brains but oh well, Fri the 13th is seen as an unlucky day for no good reason at all. Also remember that due to the differences between the Julian and Gregorian calendars 1st January is not the New Year, today is the New Year (and in India today). I’ve explained some of this HERE, the Spring Equinox HERE and then Easter/Songkran HERE

Everybody should their Mama (the real Mother and Mother Earth) regardless of whether they’re fe/male, and it’s the time of the Dark Mother.

Thumb down to the enemy:


Predators and their lust for control

Those who want/need/desire the Mother and Daughter and will do anything to get/keep/pollute them.

This is an excerpt from a film review I wrote in June 2014:


The Men in Grey try to bribe Momo with dolls, not old fashioned ‘homely’ or intricate collectors dolls or even false baby images given to girls to promote/encourage breeding and being ‘prepared’ for adulthood whilst children, but bigger versions of ‘Barbie’ like dolls. The stereotypical Hollywood ‘illuminati’ style puppets or birds in gilded cages we are shown as idols to aspire to be/look like. A look which is an inverted take on beauty, that which is beautiful and attractive but hated/sneered at/envied/underestimated at the same time because of being beautiful and attractive. It is used as a tool for insecurity as well as an ‘object’ of desire, many wanting to control/own it thus taking away its freedom and/or desecrating it e.g. lepidoptery, often decreasing its beauty as a result – something the owner can then mock the previously beautiful with, despise and relish at the same time because that which was beautiful/higher than the controller is now visibly lower and can even cause disgust and be blamed for a loss that is not necessarily or majorly its own fault. That fits into the name of the initial doll ‘Lola’ given to Momo which is a twist on the Mother Goddess’ name Lalita, a twist aptly described in Vladimir Nabokov’s book ‘Lolita’. A book that’s been romanticized, seen as not that bad and been overshadowed by the gothic sub-genre of fashion. Like many authors of what we consider ‘classic’ and ‘iconic’ literature he was well educated (knowledge of the mystery schools), and knew about the true meaning and ‘story’ of the name Lolita (also known as Sophia in later, streamlined systems) and depicted the desecration aka Fall of the Daughter in his book which many find touching and intellectual. (Much like how many cite the Kama Sutra as if they didn’t know it explained how to ‘legally’ rape.) In the book he re-names her aka formally claims possession and ownership. That book goes into how the Fall happens or is desired to happen in the mundane/profane/physical ‘this reality’ way but a less famous book ‘Pamela: Or Virtue Rewarded’ by Samuel Richardson (interestingly enough the name of demi-urge responsible for the Fall is later related to the name ‘Samuel’) published in 1740 touches upon the same theme but without the metaphysical aspect. That said back then it was more permissive to call overcoming the horrors that happen to the girl ‘virtue’ and ‘reward’.

Momo 1986 surrounded by dolls

Interestingly enough when Gigi is distracted from Momo’s disappearance he is controlled by handlers, his name changed from Gigi to Girolamo signifying his transformation. They own him, an action that is more than just a stage name, it’s a character change, a name change like a passing of a deed of ownership like a fiscal marriage.

“You’ve belonged to us for quite a while, body and soul, don’t say you didn’t know that. You’re a rubber doll, we blow you up and if you give us trouble we’ll just let your air out. Forget about it! We mean well hahahaha hehehehe… Do you believe that you owe your present position to your insignificant talent?… You are and you remain a dreamer, before you were Prince Girolamo wearing the mask of poor Gigi and what are you now? Gigi the poor wretch behind the mask of the TV star Girolamo… Don’t worry your pretty little head over her (Momo), you can’t help her and certainly not by telling funny stories about us! But we won’t stop you playing the hero if you want to destroy yourself go ahead… Gigi isn’t it much more pleasant to be rich and famous?”

His handlers (working for the Men in Grey) look very much like the dolls offered to Momo but come to life demonstrating a line of controllers and puppets within the same school of thought yet hierarchical. So the dolls are controlled but control those lower down the chain (think Donatella’s ‘Versace for H&M’ advert a while ago and her comments about the conveyor belt and clone models handled like puppets.) The dolls say “I’m baby girl, the perfect doll, everybody will be jealous of you because of me. I’d like more things.” To play with it, more and more friends/items/accessories are needed until a society based on buying and keeping up with the ‘Jones’’ is in place. Momo confronts the Grey trying to bribe her and reduces him to revealing himself in the face of her truth/real love/sincerity. This scares the shit out of him and he demands she forget everything he’s said.

In regards to public media the desired ending is always the same, no matter how much truth is in the vehicle e.g. film, song, series, characters etc, no matter how much they’re coded/symbolic. In regards to Momo – the point was to make the Mother figure into the Daughter figure to control her. And for those of you desperate for the ‘French connection’ in my life one of the names is in there.

In the book ‘Lolita’ – Dolores ‘Lo’ ‘Lola’ ‘Dolly’ at 12-years-old (when my ‘grooming’ was ‘activated’ with induced sleep paralysis) is sexually abused and turned into Lolita ‘the perfect lover’ [corrupted form of ancient Indian Ultimate Mother Goddess Creator of All ‘Lalit[h]a’] through the grooming, trauma/confusion/predatory behaviour and then ‘goes off the rails’ (out of the arches/off the train) only to be ‘rescued’ by her abuser/orchestrator/handler/contaminator. She is poignantly his ‘landlady’s’ daughter, and for his plot to work he must become the Father and her demoted in status to his daughter. Dolores/Dolly reminds him of an older/earlier ‘love’ Anna-Bel[l].


Plot Summary

Humbert Humbert*, a European literary scholar, describes the premature death of his childhood sweetheart, Annabel Leigh. He suggests his unconsummated love for her caused his fixation with nymphets (girls aged 9–14) and indulges in his sexual fantasies by pretending to read a book in a public park and being aroused by nymphets playing near him, as well as by visiting a prostitute who he believes is 16 or 17, and imagining her to be three years younger. After a misadventure when he requests a nymphet-aged girl from a pimp, Humbert marries an adult woman with childish mannerisms, Valeria, to allay suspicion. His marriage with Valeria dissolves, after she admits to having an affair with a Russian taxi driver. Humbert wants to kill her, but Valeria and the taxi driver leave before he gets the chance. After another visit to a psychiatric ward after a mental breakdown, he moves to the small New England town of Ramsdale to write.

Humbert fantasizes about meeting and eventually molesting the 12-year-old daughter of an impoverished family, the McCoos, from whom he agreed to rent an apartment. Upon his arrival in Ramsdale, however, he discovers that their house has burned down. A landlady named Mrs. Charlotte Haze offers to accommodate him instead, and Humbert visits her residence out of politeness. Humbert plans to decline Charlotte’s offer until he sees her 12-year-old daughter, Dolores (born 1935), known as “Lo,” “Lola,” or “Dolly”. He becomes infatuated with her, in part because of her uncanny resemblance to Annabel, and agrees to stay at Charlotte’s house only to be near her daughter, whom he privately nicknames “Lolita.”

Humbert starts a diary in which he keeps detailed descriptions of Lolita’s characteristics, along with moments that they spend together. The diary also contains hateful comments about Charlotte, along with a description of a picture in a magazine of a playwright (Clare Quilty), who Lolita has a crush on and who Humbert resembles.

Charlotte, Lolita, her friend Mary, and Humbert plan to go to Hourglass Lake for a picnic one Sunday. However, Mary’s mother phones to tell them that Mary is running a fever and that she can’t go. Mrs. Haze postpones the picnic and, as a result, Lolita refuses to go to church with her. Mrs. Haze leaves for church and Humbert and Lolita are left alone. While the two sing a song, Humbert secretly ejaculates in his pants as Lolita sits on his lap. She does not notice and leaves for the movies. After returning from a lunch in town, Charlotte tells Humbert that Lolita is going to camp Thursday and she won’t return until the next school year.

That Thursday, before getting in the car, Lolita runs back into the house and kisses Humbert goodbye. As Charlotte, who has fallen in love with Humbert, drives Lolita to summer camp, the housemaid delivers a letter to Humbert from Charlotte telling him that he must either marry her or move out to avoid embarrassment. To continue living near Lolita, Humbert agrees to marry Charlotte. After finding Humbert’s diary and learning his true feelings, Charlotte confronts him, calling him a “detestable, abominable, criminal fraud.” As Humbert goes into the kitchen to get them drinks, Charlotte runs out of the house with the letters that she had just written, but is killed by a passing car before she can mail them. A little girl gives Humbert the letters, and he later examines them: one was to Lolita telling her they were moving, another to a boarding school in which Lolita was to be enlisted, and a third to Humbert that suggested a possible reuniting between him and Charlotte in the future.

Humbert retrieves Lolita from camp, lying that Charlotte has been hospitalized, and takes Lolita to a hotel, where he plans to use a sleeping pill on Lolita and rape her while she is unconscious. As he waits for the pill to take effect, he wanders through the hotel and meets a man (Quilty) who inquires about Lolita. Humbert excuses himself from the strange conversation and returns to the hotel room. There, he finds that the sedative was too mild after seeing Lolita drifting in and out of sleep. He lies next to her all night, fantasizing about him and her together. However, it is she who initiates sex in the morning, showing him what she had learned at summer camp. On their way to the fake hospital that Charlotte was supposed to be staying at, Humbert tells Lolita that her mother is dead. Thereafter Lolita and Humbert drive around the country, moving from state to state and motel to motel. To keep Lolita from going to the police, Humbert tells her that if he is arrested, she will become a ward of the state and lose all her clothes and belongings. He also bribes her with food, money, or permission to attend fun events in return for sexual favors. After a year of touring North America, the two settle in another New England town, where Lolita is enrolled in a girls’ school. Humbert becomes very possessive and strict, forbidding Lolita to take part in after-school activities or to associate with boys. The headmistress of the school see his strictness as the concern of a loving, though old-fashioned, parent. Humbert reluctantly grants Lolita permission to join the school play in exchange for more sexual favors. The play she joins is written by Mr. Clare Quilty, but Humbert doesn’t know it. Just before opening night, Lolita and Humbert have a ferocious argument, and Lolita runs away. Humbert searches frantically until he finds her bike next to the phone booth she was using. She brushes the phone call off and reconciles with him, saying she wants to go on another road trip with him, only this time she gets to choose where they go.

As Lolita and Humbert drive westward again, Humbert becomes suspicious that someone is following them, first thinking it’s a cop and then later one of Lolita’s admirers from school. Lolita falls ill and must convalesce in a hospital, while Humbert stays in a nearby motel. The hospital staff tells Humbert in the morning that her uncle checked her out. Humbert embarks upon a frantic search to find Lolita and her abductor, retracing his steps to every hotel that they’d been to thus far, but fails to track them. During his search, Humbert has a two-year relationship (ending in 1952) with a woman named Rita, whom he describes as a “kind, good sport” who “solemnly approve[s]” of his search for Lolita, while knowing none of the details.

Humbert receives a letter from Lolita, now 17, who tells him that she is married, pregnant, and in desperate need of money. Humbert tracks down the address and finds Lolita, but her husband is not the man that kidnapped her. He promises to give her money in exchange for the name of the man who abducted her. She reveals that Clare Quilty checked her out of the hospital and tried to make her star in one of his pornographic films; but expelled her upon refusal because she only wanted to be with Quilty. She worked odd jobs before meeting and marrying her husband, Dick, who knows nothing about her past. Although she looks much older now, Humbert realizes that he still loves Lolita and repeatedly asks her to leave Dick and go with him, which she refuses. He gives her $4,000, which is much more than what she asked for, and then leaves. As he leaves, she smiles and shouts goodbye as if he was her own father. Humbert tracks down the dentist who knows where to find Quilty, and later kills Quilty in his own mansion. Shortly afterwards, he is arrested for driving on the wrong side of the road and running a red light. The narrative closes with Humbert’s final words to Lolita in which he wishes her well, and reveals the novel in its metafiction to be the memoirs of his life, only to be published after he and Lolita have both died. The novel’s fictional foreword states that Humbert dies of coronary thrombosis after completing the manuscript, just one or two months after getting arrested. It also states that “Mrs. Richard F. Schiller” (Lolita) died giving birth to a stillborn girl on Christmas Day, 1952, at the age of 17, a month after Humbert’s death on November 16, 1952.

*Humbert – means ‘bright (light for you likers of ‘light’ vs ‘dark’) warrior’ ‘bearcub’ who becomes ‘famous/Hun’; he is ultimately the demi-urge, the deviation, the mutation, the mistake that raped his Mother and Creation/Daughter to conquer and became the singular and false Godhead. There’s nothing ‘romantic’ about that despite the ‘exquisite language’ fans of this book keep going on about and other ‘classics’ in general.

The reason why I mentioned the book ‘Pamela: Or Virtue Rewarded’ was because my Mum, Sis and I each had a book in our lives when we were younger; Mum was constantly reminded of ‘Lolita’, I had ‘Pamela’ (where Pamela, like Lolita ends up with her abuser(s) but respected/false hierarchical acknowledgement via being virtuously stubborn and resistant whereas Lolita is made as desperate and downtrodden as possible so she can’t even think) and my Sis had ‘Great Expectations’ (which she was too young to read) – I and my sis ‘chose’/were drawn to the books we had but they were telling of the situations we were in. I later decided an old dictionary suited me better (which recently some people wanted to ‘drown’/submerge/ruin) and my sis, well…

‘People’ have always ‘gifted’ me books they want me to be like or take notice of something in like an encyclopedia of ‘Alchemy’ i.e. masonic symbolism and Machiavelli’s ‘The Prince’ (another way of saying the modern masculanized version, Divine Child, of the The Princess/Daughter) but I prefer to choose my own; for example on on my many visits to Camden Market in London I only had a few minutes, so went into the indoor book market (takes up almost the whole ground level) near the Lock[e] (before the convenient fire and restructuring into a tardis type maze) and ‘said’ to the books that I wanted the one I was meant to have. I automatically went to a random area (can’t remember if they were in sections or jumble sale style mix), picked up a book, opened it at a random page and the only words in Italics (different/highlighted to the rest of the normal text) said ‘Hello Dolly’ (musical/song reference, written by someone also corrupting the Mother/Daughter story and sexualizing it). I still have that book and my dictionary, and ultimately they’re all I need unlike all the magi/witches/whatevers out there dependent on tools but that said I can makeshift if I have to ‘divine’ anything in a pinch, I’m an ‘oracle’/eye and a unicorn (the one horn/eye piercer of the veil, the ultimate self-driven living mount of the Goddess but also in Princess/Daughter form so mount and mouth) afterall and tools or ‘friends’ as I really see them [which are respected/appreciated] just help you focus; only people who have little to no ability rely on pomp, ceremony, regalia, perversion and control.

The separation and/or merging of the Mother/Daughter is very important to people and ‘people’ who want things to continue as they are, to get away with everything, like nothing happened, like its ok, downplay and hide everything.

Here’s an interesting song:

The lyrics have been changed multiple times to include ‘whisky’ (the mind confuser), ‘dollar’ (think Dorothy/Doll/Dor – hence the ‘eye’ on the separated/unattached capstone of the pyramid on the US dollar and a whole bunch of other symbolism for those who’ve followed the White rabbit – Alice in Wonderland reference – down the rabbit hole/opened pyramid/mountain i.e. secret knowledge for the initiated. Oz being the trickster/false magician, sleight of hand, illusionist, paper money over Gold, and her Silver shoes changed to Red for the Silver Screen version) and ‘pretty little boy’ (masculanization, modern version of the ‘Daughter’).


Well, show me the way
To the next whisky bar
Oh, don’t ask why
Oh, don’t ask why
Show me the way
To the next whisky bar
Oh, don’t ask why
Oh, don’t ask why
For if we don’t find
The next whisky bar

I tell you we must die
I tell you we must die
I tell you, I tell you
I tell you we must die

Oh, moon of Alabama
We now must say goodbye
We’ve lost our good old mama
And must have whiskey, oh, you know why

Oh, moon of Alabama
We now must say goodbye
We’ve lost our good old mama
And must have whisky, oh, you know why

Well, show me the way
To the next little girl
Oh, don’t ask why
Oh, don’t ask why

Show me the way
To the next little girl
Oh, don’t ask why
Oh, don’t ask why
For if we don’t find
The next little girl

I tell you we must die
I tell you we must die
I tell you, I tell you
I tell you we must die

Oh, moon of Alabama
We now must say goodbye
We’ve lost our good old mama
And must have whisky, oh, you know why


The “Alabama Song”—also known as “Moon of Alabama”, “Moon over Alabama”, and “Whisky Bar”—is an English song written for Bertolt Brecht by his close collaborator Elisabeth Hauptmann in 1925 and set to music by Kurt Weill for the 1927 play Little Mahagonny. It was reused for the 1930 opera Rise and Fall of the City of Mahagonny and has been notably covered by The Doors and David Bowie.*

Original version
The “Alabama Song” was written as a poem in idiosyncratic English for Bertolt Brecht by his close collaborator Elisabeth Hauptmann in 1925[1] and published in Brecht’s 1927 Home Devotions (German: Hauspostille), a parody of Martin Luther’s collection of sermons. It was set to music by Kurt Weill for the 1927 play Little Mahagonny (Mahagonny-Songspiel) and reused for Brecht and Weill’s 1930 opera Rise and Fall of the City of Mahagonny (Aufstieg und Fall der Stadt Mahagonny), where it is sung by Jenny and her fellow prostitutes* in Act I. Although the majority of all three works is in German, the “Alabama Song” retained Hauptmann’s English lyrics throughout.

*David Bowie the ‘starman’ used this song on his ‘I-Solar II’ Tour (the II being Sol’s twin). Was also released with ‘Space Oddity’.

*Remember prostitutes don’t symbolize prostitution in freemasonry and secret/mystery schools, though they do represent the ‘fall’ of the Divine Feminine and the fall of original reproduction into what we consider normal/natural reproduction/sexuality. They were the ‘blood’ (Red), menstrual blood, women and blood priestesses. Sacred sexuality which is about the ability to create, preserve and destroy i.e. the Mother, Daughter and Dark Mother which later became the Maiden, Mother and Crone (in a ‘chronological’ and wrong order in order to encapsulate regular women/control their way of life). Sacred sexuality is innocent sensuality, but has been perverted to make out its about having sex, sex rituals, orgies, live sex shows etc, making and downgrading the pure into more and more ‘earthly’ physical, heavy, lower, disconnected to/from the mental and indeed sex abuse is used to disassociate people from their feelings of personal identity/awareness (many prostitutes and sex related workers say they ‘disassociate’ from themselves/the situation to manage), to traumatise, to confuse, distract, compartmentalize and ultimately control. On a sidenote – when you see references to ‘red geraniums’ in ‘classic’ books that implies the character was ‘whorish’/untrustworthy etc like in ‘To Kill a Mockingbird’, when I was very young people used to tell me my name meant [Red] flower without telling me what the name really meant and indeed what even the Red flower was and really meant – using surface symbolism such as in modern religion makes it look very bad but it was a prayer flower used for the Goddess Kali/Dark Mother/Root Goddess/Prehistoric and probably why some still call me Tiger Lily (and others use the Lily for the French/English competition). That isn’t what my name means as I’ve since found, ‘I am’ the Daughter not the Dark Mother but since they knew they couldn’t turn me into the Mother (though they’ve certainly obsessed about it) because they had the Mother/My Mother and there’s only one incarnation at a time (like with the Slayer, there’s only one Slayer and it’s always her reborn and she has the her own unique blood connection to the Warrior Goddess/the First/the Dark Mother – the primal, primordial, source, the dark/secret – The Mothers back ‘home’). Unlike regular lineage it doesn’t inherit through breeding, genetic modification or even wishing i.e. ritual invoking (like people do for ‘avatars’) and this is why we’re so rare/sought after. I/Eye/Iris/Lily/Lotus (not A.I as some would like to make out) the pine-apple came to find the [corrupted/hurt/tricked/imprisoned] Mother Goddess here, leaving my Mother/everyone’s Mothers back ‘home’ to do so hence becoming the [fallen] Daughter. This is why current masons call me the ‘Princess in the Pyramid’, ‘Divine Child’, ‘Prince’ instead of ‘Princess/Daughter/Goddess’ above/outside the [now false] Mountain, remember the Mother Goddess used to encapsulate the Mountain/Earth but now it’s represented as a Mountain/Pyramid/Triangle of false hierarchy. The Daughter came, she found, she battled, she called home, she waited, kept battling, kept protecting, kept falling, kept battling, kept protecting, kept falling to bring what is in the dark to the light, changing/piercing reality to merge the seen and unseen, to get them to interact/talk, come out into the open, pull whats hidden in plain sight out of hiding but also put the sacred back into the dark where it belongs – the secret – the Mother – which has been abused beyond words – back into the hands of the Dark Mother/form of the Dark Mother. And now They’re here.

There’s a counter story ready and basically having the same ‘illuminati’ ending ready for/set in 2019 (when/after I was supposed to ‘die’ at 36, I’m a Winterborn so there’s crossover in the calendar year but by sometime in 2019) where ultimately the ‘coming’ ‘comet’ has no affect at all even after thousands of years of warnings and preparations by blood/breeding and genetic modification cults/labs and she lives ‘happily ever after’ with the ‘man’ she loves who she was unable to touch previously, and life goes on as if nothing happened, just dealing with the ‘endless struggle’ as usual instead of a dramatic change, they get to keep the Daughter whose come round to their way of thinking through ‘love’. Most recently reiterated in the Jupiter Ascending film, and changing Venus to Jupiter because Jupiter is more likely to take the ‘beating’/get in the way of the Ma-tri-X system or so some people ‘hope’/want to convey/persuade the Daughter to think. I came up with a character when I was 14 called Dark Angel based on my personality to be a fighter for the WWE (fight entertainment company with their ‘stables’), she ended up as the basis for Max in Dark Angel:

Similar to the use of characters Chyna and Lita in Relic Hunter and Dark Angel.

Goes well with the feeling many of us feel (and one of my favourite songs just before the show was released), who do their best but in the end just come to leave, and the game continues.

VNV Nation – Darkangel

Look at the flag of Alabama, what do you see? Yes it’s a rotated version of the English flag – Britain being the place the Daughter figure (e.g. my Mother and Gabrielle in Xena) is taken to be violated, turned into the Mother (but ultimately is saved by the Dark Mother – something they don’t realize or want to) and in the Xena story they ultimately turn Gabrielle back into a Daughter figure and Xena ‘dies’ becoming the Holy Ghost/Spirit (still the Dark Mother) who for the sake of the story stays with Gabrielle but in ‘reality’-meta-reality-other-secret-reality means she’s made invisible/changes/demoted/tricked/leaves/becomes less imposing/more ethereal/mythical. So they get to keep the newly empowered Daughter (who has the Dark Mother’s chakra[m]) who can work for them.

US state flags
The Red and White stripes were mentioned to me following my French visit post about people who knew I’d be visiting back in 2009 and I didn’t know they’d know. Those of the Red and White stripes (and different use of the lions) were glad I’d rejected that and as usual saw it as an association with them instead, begging friendship but making it look like me choosing them. The Red and White stripes is another way of referring to the English flag, which has also been used in the places in the following link interesting ways (like with the moon which is a satellite and reflector of the sun, for the Earth it can be called a smaller/second sun, a reference Sol’s twin but a false one hence its false association with the ‘feminine’ which is really everything/every cosmic body but epitomized by stars): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/St_George’s_Cross

(Interestingly though I’m not too surprised, is the use of it for Georgia and some people knowing without me telling them and highlighting that Rome/the current ‘pop[e]’ isn’t actually adverse to the Goddess nowadays, whilst Britain particularly England and Scotland still is.)

And of course the notorious Red Cross ‘charity’…

The song was written for a false Red&Gold (divinity) (and false useless ‘inheri[heir]tors’ thinking they’re royalty, as well as mixing up the Red – cosmic, and Earth – Blue/Green, to make Purple) place:


The Little Mahagonny was based on five ‘Mahagonny Songs’, which had been published earlier in the year in Brecht’s collection of poetry, Devotions for the Home (Hauspostille), together with tunes by Brecht. To these five was added a new poem, “Poem on a Dead Man”, that was to form the finale. Two of the songs were English-language parodies written by Elisabeth Hauptmann: the “Alabama Song” and “Benares Song”. Using one or two of Brecht’s melodies as a starting-point, Weill began in May to set the songs to music and to compose orchestral interludes along the following pattern:

Song One | Little March | Alabama Song | Vivace | Song Two | Vivace assai | Benares Song | Sostenuto (Choral) | Song Three | Vivace assai | Finale: Poem on a Dead Man

The Little Mahagonny was first produced at the new German chamber music festival at Baden-Baden on 17 July 1927. Brecht directed, Lotte Lenya played Jessie, and the set-design was by Caspar Neher, who placed the scene in a boxing-ring before background projections that interjected scene-titles at the start of each section. According to a sketch published years later, they read:

-The great cities in our day are full of people who do not like it there.
-So get away to Mahagonny, the gold town situated on the shores of consolation far from the rush of the world.
-Here in Mahagonny life is lovely.
-But even in Mahagonny there are moments of nausea, helplessness and despair.
-The men of Mahagonny are heard replying to God’s inquiries as to the cause of their sinful life.
-Lovely Mahagonny crumbles to nothing before your eyes.

The song is written by ‘interesting people’ at an ‘interesting time’ as well, remember these are long term, very long term plans – a ’round’ in a game/battle – the wars of gods. Momo (the book, 1973, written by Michael Ende) and originally called ‘The Grey Gentlemen’ for example showed Brown-skinned Momo turning up out of nowhere, through a tunnel/hole/cave, and since no one wants to personally look after her they share her and say she can live in the amphitheatre. The song Alabama was written by a Beth/a-class Elisabeth Hauptmann (for Bertolt Brecht – who was focused on overt poli-tics rather than the symbolic/real rulers – so they had both sides, seen and unseen covered – and for those in the know the ‘hidden in plain sight’) who also co-wrote The Threepenny Opera starring a character of a name that one old influential and patriarchal family wanted me to have ‘Polly’ and as explained in the last post I made – an interview from Dr Salter done by Sott.net – they mention the PollyAnna Principle mentality of society (Anna being a Goddess connection too from the old Indian Annapurna aged/meaning 16 a reference/form of S[h]odashi the TriPura Sundari – or Lalita Tripura Sundari, both the and one of the Dasha (Ten) MahaVidyas (9 Kali/Dark Mothers forms completed made 10 as/by/of/with the whole Lalita, who were copied by later Durga’s imitations) who was then corrupted with the pairing of usurper Hinduism (male triad and fake ‘queens’ triad of Shaktism) with the ‘cradles of civilization’ where you also get Inanna/Ishtar. Annapurna keeps her food/plenty/fire/harvest/abundance connection in later Ishtar/Inanna versions in classical antiquity and by them completely even more corrupted/perverted/topsy turvy like ‘Mary’ style names, those names are often in the game/false Mountain rather than against/out of it). However, coming from a matrilineal line but who were corrupted by patriarchy I had to have an original not lesser/false Daughter name, because it means so much more to control the real thing. That said modern and ignorant but think they’re something masons in ‘sunnyland’ where we reside like to always call Mother by name instead of hers – Lalita (the original Creator, the G in their insignia – G standing both for Goddess and for ‘G’ as in ‘super’ from the Indian where you add ‘G’ at the end of the title to say ‘extra’ ‘super’ ultimate’, e.g. Mata Gi, Guru Gi, Master Gi – which they’ve lowered massively into ‘master’ and ‘grand master’.) They’ve always referred to her as Dolly instead of Lalita and have even consistently mispelled her name in multiple ways until I made them do it right every time and at other times call her ‘Molly’ or have someone standing near/passing addressed as ‘Molly’ instead. They refuse to acknowledge because they want the nicer Daughter instead, who they think will somehow give up the Mother for them the false ‘kin’ the manikins (especially those who’ve elevated/ascended/’rose’ – I’ll get to the ‘rose’ in another post – themselves to false god level and fear the Gods/Mothers) and if that doesn’t work will sacrifice herself [over and over again] and even the Mother [again].

Not happening and it’s too late anyway, so there motherf*ckers.


Set in Victor[y]ian London, the play focuses on Macheath*, an amoral, antiheroic criminal.

Macheath (“Mackie,” or “Mack the Knife”) marries Polly Peachum*. This displeases her father, who controls the beggars of London, and he endeavours to have Macheath hanged. His attempts are hindered by the fact that the Chief of Police, Tiger Brown, is Macheath’s old army comrade. Still, Peachum exerts his influence and eventually gets Macheath arrested and sentenced to hang. Macheath escapes this fate via a deus ex machina moments before the execution when, in an unrestrained parody of a happy ending, a messenger from the Queen* arrives to pardon Macheath and grant him the title of Baron.

The Threepenny Opera is a work of epic theatre. It challenges conventional notions of property as well as those of theatre.

* (Like Mac-beth, Scottish version.)

*Peach is an alternative softer/less knowing symbol for the apple, easier to control/abuse as a person. ‘You’re a peach… darl (doll), thanks [smirk/grin/wink or nowadays cough]’. ‘Life’s a peach’ goes well with the Pollyanna Principle and the story of the girl who played the glad game ‘gladly’ making the best of everything, rose tinted glasses, letting them get away with it – not intentionally but because people are taught to make the best of it and let the rest take care of it/themselves even if you’re using them, that can’t be helped, that’s just life. Bad things happen, then they pass, and look less bad over time (with revisionism, advertising and collective memory loss). Don’t worry it’ll all work out but really continues. ‘Keep Calm and Carry On’ with the [false] crown over it – an inversion of the Dark Mother in the book Aunt/Spinster Polly whose way would have actually been better for Pollyanna. The name wouldn’t have suited me for that reason but also because I’m not Dark Mother (and remember the Daughter and Dark Mother titles are honourary ‘Mother’ titles in that they don’t imply creative ability but are still carers/protectors.) Sorry (not) but I’m an ‘Angry [multi-element]Bird’ who was/is properly pictured as Red [fire/blood/star/divinity] though improperly portrayed as male 😉 and he does save the birds who can’t fly anymore because they’re so glad to live in glad/happyland society which they think is safe with all their rules/regulations/’events’ and then from the pigs/false security who steal their eggs/children/creative principle, very Animal Farm style.

*False ‘queen’ – Victory and Beth. Victory being the traditional/older reference for false queens (and a fusion from India-to-Britain).

(Think on why the Goddess figure – including masculanized figures like Superman – in superhero stories are often paired with/relationship wise a military or journalist male who doesn’t usually have her best interests at heart, but wants to keep her for [secret] ‘society’s agenda too.)

I hold the scythe, I am fate, I am the unicorn, I reign myself, the chooser of divinity and I was both chosen and have chosen myself the Daughter, I have found the Mother and signalled the Dark Mothers return and became the Dark side of my Daughter self. I rose from the ashes and I am the last. Death is my gift. Real Death not the false death of this poisoned planet. Death is a blessing/honour for the good and punishment for the bad. Death/She is beautiful, She is both radiant and dark. You’ve lost. Do yourselves a favour and surrender.


The Hidden Goddess

I’ve just finished reading a book called ‘Freemasonry and the Hidden Goddess’ by William Bond. Mum’s had the book for a few years but for some reason I’ve only just gotten to it. He highlights via the internal masonic artwork (that is artwork by masons for masons), archaeological sites and historical events that Freemasonry is actually a Goddess religion but a religion within a religion. This is true of all the major religions and belief systems in general – the more you advance the more you are privy to e.g. learning a subject in depth in secondary school compared to primary, re-learning the rules in college and re-evaluating the whole subject in university before being allowed to credibly postulate. Meeting fundamental requirements to progress and know more otherwise there’d be no point in a job progression, everyone/thing must have their place. In terms of culture and religion young versions of older beliefs and the oldest belief system that we know of on this planet is the Mother Goddess.

William goes further however to say that whilst Freemasonry is patriarchal (and only recently allowing female members en mass though there had been exceptions and female lodges/orders) it allows its members to practise and learn about any other religion or belief system too, contains very obvious Goddess mysteries and symbolism and that there are/may be or have been members that were knowingly Goddess worshippers. Additionally that they knew they were following Goddess religion hidden in a Father God religion to prevent them from being hunted for example by their old enemies the Roman Catholic Church.

This isn’t a surprise to anyone who has studied prehistoric cultures and root cultures as I call them (prehistoric and early overlapping cultures with the cradles), the cradles of civilization and history since then but I think it was good to go back to my early days of discovering this group and focus on concentrated symbolism like this for a while. Having spent so long looking at the distribution formats e.g. religion, media, governing bodies, orders etc I was having a ‘crisis of faith’ in that I haven’t had any since I started learning about this ‘stuff’ and it was starting to seem like that wasn’t ok anymore. Like many others I’ve always been looking for sense in the contradictions, for the truth regarding changes, if there is any, but I was never convinced I’d found it. I know a bit about the roots and prehistory but I can’t really know let alone enough about those people/their beliefs to believe like they did, knowledge and belief don’t have to go together but they do for me. I don’t have to believe and I’ve not looked for something to believe in specifically but for a while life was making it seem like I should.

Even for those not interested in symbolism or the meaning of symbolism, the artwork alone might be interesting for those into conceptual and surreal art, yet artworks that follow patterns/code. Additionally the information on archaeological cover-ups e.g. closing sites, changing management and sponsorship is informative and William’s questions in general shows more deference (ironically, but hey we can’t say they’re not ingenious) to the effort put in than those masons who just see it as a big social club.

Freemasonry and The Hidden Goddess by William Bond PDF Version
View the book on Scribd

Other titles by this author:
Mermaids, Witches and Amazons
Gospel Of The Goddess
Divine Goddess
The Matriarchal Tao
Matriarchy FAQs

He doesn’t include much metaphysical, emotional and mental symbolism at times, he mentions meditation but doesn’t really go into the exploration of the consciousness and soul, he mostly sees the sexual symbolism and is a bit simplistic about male and female behaviour/characteristics. I can see why to an extent since sexual symbolism tends to be either promoted or suppressed but there are more contexts and where he gets stuck when trying to express something as sexual and finds it doesn’t work mostly then tries to find another way it could be sexual or sexual politics rather than something else. I say mostly because in some cases he’s talking in prophetic terms and I don’t know what to make of those. In the final chapters he talks about the mind but as an active tool for control. His opinion on how Freemasonry has behaved isn’t set, it changes throughout the book and contradicts, like he’s learning whilst explaining, I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing here because it means he can see exceptions to general trends though at the same time like all of us has his opinions on how people relate to each other. For example he’s against the belief that masons influence society and then gives example after example of how they have through government, religion, science and technology and named powerful, public members. Also he speaks about the contradictions/misuse of ‘masculine’ and ‘feminine’ traits but asserts them himself, basically he sounds confused and I can see why. We can see the evidence of peaceful and sophisticated Mother Goddess societies and civilizations before and at the same time as the cradles of civilization but they were conquered, incorporated, changed and we’ve been at a stagnant, frustrating never ending state of unrest, fighting, misuse of resources, and fear ever since and knowledge of these societies is taboo, restricted, defaced, sites kept closed and destroyed. He states civilizations with male and female or just male gods end up war torn with some rich and many poor people, people and other animals have lost their dignity. There seems no solution or end to it.

So we’ve got all this evidence, what to do with it? I can see that Goddess Consciousness has been emerging in people/the media and it’s good that we’ve been learning about how history is changed and different depending on where you are, it’s ‘written by the winners’. But of course not all goddesses (or anyone) are created equal, many have been created or changed within a patriarchal framework, many characters aren’t even gods anymore they’re demons, saints or amalgamations. I don’t like all of the goddesses I’ve come across just as I don’t like all women just because I’m female. I think it’s important to know about past and original history but in one of the best info spreading methods – the entertainment media – I’m tired of all the hidden (and not so hidden, some films are ridden with seemingly unnecessary symbols all over backgrounds like product placement) info delivered in typical masonic fashion i.e. like a secret language for ‘those in the know to those in the know’ so they can ‘get’ the message if it’s meant for them whilst everybody else just thinks in terms of fails and flops – did it manipulate/move you emotionally enough over what did it mean? I just want these language masters to come out and say what they intended. I think to myself look at how long everything has been waiting, I feel more and more people are wanting a big change for the better though they don’t know and can’t agree on what better is. In my opinion the Mother Goddess left Earth or hasn’t been here in a long time, or isn’t here in the way we think/hope.

I can’t see where to go from here and I think a lot of people feel like that, there’s long been a situation of false hope vs hopelessness i.e. belief in things you can’t change yourself vs apathy or even despair for some. Sure there’s practical solutions in terms of education and application but it would take big lifestyle changes en mass with people caring about so much more than themselves to yield results. I’ve never been into the ‘for our children’ ‘through our children’ ‘the next generation(s)’ mindset, to me each and every generation matters and I’m not interested in saying ‘in the future’ whilst we all continue to suffer in the meanwhile. I don’t want to put off to some tomorrow what I can do now and I want to do it myself not as a parent, I don’t want children in any way, it’s unnatural to me and I never want that to change but obviously I care for their welfare and am certainly not deficient in sympathy and empathy. I’m sad that I can’t envision beneficial change in society in my lifetime but I’m not the kind of person who thinks ‘my child/children will continue my goals’ and I’m not interested in hoping to pass on my characteristics and re-doing the whole thing again through another body so to speak.

William’s thoughts focus on the future a lot to the point of prophesising, he seems to have a lot of certainty. For example whilst our history hasn’t been long enough to tell he talks about matriarchy and patriarchy as cycles one turning into the other through eventual disenchantment, going on and on in seemingly pointless cycles and how he states that women need to be masculine and men feminine to understand each other. I can’t see a coming matriarchal female supremacy age as he does especially since so many females have perpetuated/enabled/actively participated in female suffering but he has a different mindset and much longer view encompassing people forming definite sides, plus uses the terms matriarchy, matrilineal, feminism, egalitarian and supremacist interchangeably with a foresight I don’t have and indeed hindsight but he does include a letter from author Vicki Noble regarding Catalhöyük and in line with local Turkish scholars she believed that site and matriarchal societies lacked warfare but due to the common usage of matriarchal implying just female patriarchy other terms such as matristic or as I posted from Max Dashú (HERE) ‘mother-right’ societies may be more fitting.

Unfortunately reading this book didn’t bring me any closer to an answer in terms of whether I should believe in anything, what and why. Thinking over Mum’s and my lives I know that there a lot of people who love the yo-yo effect they have on others, what I call the ‘push and the pull’, e.g. they like to keep you constantly confused or distracted so that you can’t see their influence yet they always have to be close to you in some way. For example on one job I worked for two departments at the same time and then later a third, early on one of the managers showed me a large tattoo he had of the all seeing eye and the other manager I had tried to be a mother figure to me and a co-worker who started on the same day yet wanted to completely control me whilst the guy she favoured even to the detriment of his other co-worker. She constantly said he and I were like the real children she had and so treated us the same, I was more independently respectful yet in her opinion lacked ambition so apparently needed more control and dominance, he was good at schmoozing so was treasured. The manager wasn’t happy that I was devoted to my Mother over her, I then found she and two other females had formed a physical triangle around me and became my ‘mirrors’ taking nicknames that were versions of my name, my looks, my interests and the she still wasn’t happy that I didn’t feel the need to join in with a ‘king of the castle/hill’, overly sexual, looking down on all I survey mentality of all the managers and their assistants nor a yes’m/sir personality; apparently being hardworking, capable and efficient wasn’t enough. Once in a group conversation about life I said that I couldn’t personally accept the pick’n’mix nature of religions membership where there’s either a strict set of rules governing every part of a person’s day or the opposite – being affiliated just so you ‘belong’ and had met the basic requirement for benefits, I should of known better even though I was quiet and reflective in my comment (the manager & their assistants were always the most boisterous) but she got up and proclaimed for the whole office that she didn’t care about me or what happened to me or what I thought and walked out (it wasn’t unusual for at least one of the three triangle women to have a tantrum). Shortly after she tried to match make me with an older man who had an ancient name I instinctively found repulsive, and then a younger man who was practically called Christ the God. When I finally left she didn’t participate in my leaving meals because I hadn’t asked her if I could leave but still showed gratitude, one of the others in the triangle in charge of the leaving card signing didn’t choose a ‘wish you well/sorry you’re leaving/good luck’ card but a Dorothy Gale surrounded by her ‘friends’ card (you know the story) (which actually is a version of my name) and then she wasn’t in for the goodbye meals, so one didn’t participate and the other ‘couldn’t’. It was a strange place with stranger people, the job I was experienced in was given to a man whose wife had influence, he did nothing but filing because I and another young woman did all the work, everybody had access to the area we worked in except me, I had to knock on the door each time even though I was entitled to access like everybody else. The second job I was going to get there was given to the woman who [later] did the leaving card though she had no experience in it. Her promotion was done by one of my former bosses without the consent of the hiring manager and caused permanent friction between them. The promoted triangle woman had previously worked in the cleaning dept and her successor also decided to move into a totally unrelated job which necessitated a lot of training for both of them, and I was assigned that job to do separate to the teamwork I did, this pleased the wannabe ‘mother figure’ woman who started calling me her ‘cleaning lady’ (I wasn’t doing physical cleaning). After that was sorted the triangle point sitting behind me got up in such a way that she rammed me into my desk, looked past me like I wasn’t there despite her colleagues comments and walked off and was always to try or take anything that was meant for me i.e. from desk cabinets to my chair. Later on an inspection it turned out that when I started work that my ‘mother figure’ manager nor the office administrator or their manager had shown me the induction papers and I was escorted out to read through and sign whilst supervised otherwise I wasn’t allowed back in to where my personal belongings were. I was asked why hadn’t I signed them before but I hadn’t been working there when they were introduced so didn’t know and it was their responsibility to go through it with each new employee, and newer employees names were on the list but not mine. There were lots of stupid things like that, even being told to sign another agreement everybody else had without reading it (though I was still within the deadline), I read it, queried it which seemed to undo its significance because once I queried they had to explain that most of it didn’t actually apply to those signing. However – I was surprised by one person who saw me reading a young adult, superficial alchemical fiction book and said “Are you interested in alchemy?” Before I could answer said he’d give me a book and left. The next day he gave me an encyclopaedia with so many Masonic images in it, printed on glossy paper many in full colour and their orthodox meanings. Prior I hadn’t even realized there was more to Alchemy than Chemistry and modern sterile science, nor that it was a codename for Masonic symbolism and when I left my managers were surprised because they’d been under the impression that I couldn’t/didn’t make ‘friends’ outside of their ‘circle’ but after I announced I was leaving found people from various depts even ones I didn’t work it, unrelated ones and from other sites came to visit or sent me well wishes. I have no issue making friends and getting on with people, I just don’t like being property. I’ve come across too many that love the yo-yo effect they have on others, e.g. we lived in one place, were burgled, were moved to a building on the opposite side of the road, got burgled again even though it was a secure building, secure floor and we were the last residence on the floor so the full length of the corridor away with other residences in between the entrance door and our place by the wall. A similar thing happened later where we moved to the opposite side of the road but the situation stayed the same (getting rags jammed up our drainpipes, neighbours with generators underneath us, stolen property, strange things happening on the 21-22nd of the month etc. Ironically when we were moved, the people who took our last residence started using our identities to buy goods/services and it was the postmen who told us about it (though they weren’t allowed to under their rules – thank you to those postmen) because they knew us and didn’t want to deliver those false letters. Mum was once chased by a person in a flashy Mercedes in that area and almost pushed into a van on another. Long before she was kidnapped by a group once when she was coming back from school, they claimed they were wealthy from the vehicle industry as usual big heads but she managed to call ‘home’ (ha, ‘home’, such a wrong word since it has loving connotations – how would she know was simply between abusers) and told them to call the police, which they did and the police surrounded the place. A generic example that many people can probably relate to is if you’re in a relationship and it’s going well they’ll try to cause issues, if it’s not going well they’ll try to get you back together to sort it out, and it goes back and forth, to and fro until it somehow ends.

When I think about the volume of vicious, vindictive people in Mum’s/My life who control and manipulate via a hidden yet obvious hand reading through this book reinforces to me that I’d be totally fine in a ‘boring’ harmonious, kind existence. Mum gets weird people trying to get weird information from her e.g. a man who came upto to her in a supermarket and started talking, he tried to befriend her and later said that she had lived in a currently famous and disputed temple, that he had been the gardener and that Shiv-Vishnu-Brahm[a]-Indr[a] were her bodyguards and she automatically said “NO, they are my enemies”. Later he admitted that she was right about them being enemies. On another occasion a woman sat next to her on a train and introduced herself as a so-called 33 degree mason and asked how to contact aliens, Mum said she’d heard from online sources that you can see them with night vision glasses and she didn’t know anything else, Mum then asked her about ‘chemtrails’ and pollution/toxifying the planet and the woman looked p*ssed off and said she had no idea about any of that, Mum changed seats to move away from her. Then there was a guru asking her the finer points on ancient gods to self-proclaimed exorcists asking what happens to people when they die! Without even trying or wanting it she’s like a magnet for weirdos, we’ve just lived like everyone else, not stood out and the hounders still pile up (and for some reason like to come & go when we do, sneeze and cough at us). Many years before that I remember finding out that some people in the area we lived in were spreading rumours calling us prostitutes and witches, it turned out people in my school were doing the same and I was so naive, Mum hadn’t told me about menstruation or sex and she’d always been quite religious (well not religious anymore, spiritual instead) and old fashioned so not fodder for such gossip, by the time I got to college I still barely knew anything except the little taught in school whilst everybody else was talking casually about it with terms I didn’t know and my sister is younger, I told her about menstruation but that was it. That said I’m used to groups ganging up on me whereas people are intimidated by Mum and sister although those who try to befriend us or were in our lives at some point aren’t shy about wanting gifts/charity even though it’s obvious we’ve almost always been under the breadline. Mum and I don’t ‘do’ cliques so that shouldn’t be very ‘interesting’ but I guess it doesn’t matter how you behave, people will find or make things to gossip about.

Where we really don’t agree

He describes Siva being a victim and prehistoric and constantly refers to the most popular image of Kali where in his regular phrase ‘she walks all over him’. William should have easily found along with that image is that by that stage she was unconscious and he conscious, he could afford to lie back and enjoy what we think of as masochistic sexuality, he’s actually the winner there. She destroyed the obvious enemies but you can only sustain certain states for so long and when reaching one level in trance state your head automatically goes back and the tongue sticks out (the protruding tongue being her trademark.) By the time she gets to him she’s not conscious at all and doesn’t know what’s going on and he safely looks like the passive non threatening party. Even the non-questioning believers realize that she’s lost control, though it’s explained as ecstasy – but who has sex with an unconscious/unknowing or asleep or confused person?.. Not someone who respects you. It’s like saying to a person ‘you asked for, you wanted it, you begged for it, you came here, it’s your fault’ [smirking about it in his case since it was so easy to sacrifice those he didn’t need – a ruthless person will weaken, trick, outnumber the opponent first before facing them, if they need to face them at all]. With him ushered in the male and consort Shakti triad. The native peoples were conquered. Also the ashes William refers to that some priests wear are from death and purification rituals not about becoming a White person (Shasan Kali is the one that wears ashes, the cemetery Kali, not all the Kalis that make up the whole Kali) though he’s on the right track with the colour and nudity of statues. But as he does find the Black goddess is so important and innate to people worldwide that she had to survive and did, demoted to controlled aspect of a consort. She hasn’t been destroyed but has been long tortured, there are many things worse than death and death on this planet is described as transitional recycling it’s not even an end – it just goes on and on until you’re ‘enlightened’ and surprise surprise, you become something else that is aware of ‘oneness’ rather than dissolving into it. People are obsessed with immortality.

I don’t agree with quite a bit of his interpretation; he acknowledges that Kali is the oldest goddess, indeed oldest deity in the world, how she is or represents our much more ancient culture, predating history and that goddess and matriarchal cultures as he calls them weren’t war like, they were peaceful and yet he states Margaret Thatcher would have been a perfect example of a Kali follower. That was almost the last straw… He contradicts himself because later he calls Thatcher out for being completely ruthless, selfish, anti-feminist and her way can’t and didn’t work and yet he sees some of the stories of Kali as prophecy, so her & in his opinion Thatcher’s way will apparently work and then if/when we achieve the Mother’s way (after the Dark Mother) he then says it can’t work because it’s boring (a so-called 33 degree mason called Shiv[a] actually tried to associate himself with Mum – whom she met at a very poignant, atrocious court trial – pretending to befriend whilst not being friendly really, and stated “it was boring when you were here, we didn’t like happiness, I preferred crime otherwise there was no business’, and on another occasion “why did you come back? [Back from where?] Will you take me to your home?” Mum answered “How?” He didn’t reply, instead he decided “I’m not going to help you [with anything/life in general/nothing at all.” Ha like anyone’s ever helped anyway. It’s amazing how that guy claimed all kinds about himself but told her nothing about her except like her so-called parents used to tell her when she was little that she was married to the male god triad. B*stards. Mum didn’t even know who Kali was her whole life up until a few years ago, when she was little her ‘family’ always used other names, she didn’t even realize that massive statue that scared her was Kali at the time and her ‘family’ made her worship the male triad specifically, yet they had no problem telling me about Kali – although in their twisted ‘wife of Shiv[a]’ version). I can see that many people on this planet find harmony boring but saying Thatcher would make a good example of a Kali follower to me is like saying Hilary Clinton and despicable women like her are what we need, make things better, have our best interests at heart, will wake us up. No thanks. If you don’t know something just say so. When I don’t know something, I say it much to the annoyance of everybody, especially since I don’t do it based on who I dis/like (I’ve upset Mum a lot because she loves Kali and I’m just looking to understand but Mum also has the ‘know thyself’ harmony and strength which I don’t but greatly admire, even if not understanding makes it difficult).

Where we agree to disagree

I’m glad I read it because my own words have really sunk in, I don’t need or want to believe in the same things as people I don’t like/don’t agree with their ‘ethics’, everyone studying our past/present knows that history’s been changed/re-written/coded/hidden and that conflicting truths are kept in our consciousness in one way or another by influential people. I’ve known and learned that a lot of high level influential people really do believe in their own public information machines, the religions they’ve made, the official line in academic subjects, their titles/dress/ritual codes and aren’t deemed (let alone lesser levels) as needing to know about root cultures and prehistory or timelines/calendars so unless they study outside of their lifestyles and find out it’d never occur to them that they’re going along with the bravado circus show as well. There’s a lot of confusion but if some of them really know about and in believe in root cultures and prehistory and have gone to all these efforts to preserve the info and pass it along but in ways they wouldn’t be persecuted for I realize that I can’t reconcile the methods they’ve gone to, chameleon like undercover scenarios being like their ‘enemy’ to survive. They’re not the everyday people who’ve kept their household oral and keepsake traditions alive, there were and are plenty of those in any place where there’s a culture change but the majority of prior belief survivors are those who’ve had the resources, the power and ability to keep it going against other equally or thereabouts powerful, wealthy, resourceful people. Like I’ve always said it’s a [ongoing] struggle for world power and I’ve never had any desire to dominate or control, to own the world or anything, nor have I ever wanted anyone/thing to own/have any claim/right to me, I don’t want to be a part of the ‘game’. I also realize that if it was a fight between real egalitarian people from the old days vs the warlike people who conquered then the former would have died out or wouldn’t be in positions of power to spread their message. The internet has been a ‘game changer’ – obscure information and information available previously only to academics and security has been made available to those who decide to read it amongst the masses of superficial items too (like in any library or shop). But I’ve never believed the ‘end justifies the means’, the ‘means’ makes you who you are, you can reach the same goal by different means and not be anything alike. William says as much too but doesn’t seem as bothered by the power struggle and puts his faith in the ‘type’ of women and male supporters he doesn’t seem to like in order to get to a Mother culture that perhaps he would like.

At the crux

Technically we’re not all masons but in practise anyone from any belief system is masonic, you don’t have to be a paid up member of a lodge or honoured with a title of some sort (that includes professional and academic titles that come with respected influence) let alone higher up the ladder. Being masonic is simply being part of any organisation that has influence in society and using their tools/information/services so I guess we all are to extent, you can’t get away from it, even walking on the road you’ll come across the signs, the names, people, the architecture, there are territorial ownership markings and rules everywhere (and where ownership isn’t obvious conflicting interests manage to ‘share’ the area like the Antarctic. It’s a crime to be a ‘vagrant’, to be homeless, public spaces they’ve deemed as ultimately theirs under prefecture. All the land and water and air, even outer space, there’d be nowhere left with the way people behave. So they’ve made us all masonic in looks at least and a lot in mind. You can’t abstain, abdicate, opt out otherwise you can’t live in society, have anything to do with it because you won’t be allowed to and most of society won’t want anything to do with you, so mutual peace is out because your existence is a threat to society’s paranoid reality – people that have opted out and tried to be self-sustainable get infiltrated and labelled as a cult that are put down military style or tribes that are culled in the name of big business and public need for resources, it’s terrible and moreso given that all the popular, accepted, tolerated systems in societies are cults, just bigger. I would like to abstain, abdicate, not fight, live in peace and harmony, and I don’t see why actually I couldn’t; I’m a well behaved, reliable, loving, trustworthy, caring person but technically I couldn’t because I couldn’t be a member of any society since every society wants your full agreement/cooperation/surveillance or ignorance to participate or have access to anything on the planet, that’s what makes you a good citizen, it’s not about being a good person.

So I just keep getting on with it like everybody does, but I won’t believe and it’s not out of my own ‘free will’ – a concept invented to be compromised. You wouldn’t have to assert it if you weren’t born with it already used on your behalf. It’s contract law and with obvious trade most people aren’t against that. ‘The Law of One’ or the ‘Ra Files’ don’t apply because people are not the original beings that lived like that and Ra or the beings who used that name, those aligned with the ancient Egyptians weren’t like that, even if they claimed they were we’ve seen they were just another empire. Maybe we don’t have to be original beings but we don’t have their abilities and non-harm ethics, and when we don’t have those we’re just living (and not necessarily thinking/fully conscious) tools/weapons. I personally think this planet had more than enough not to need it yet we’ve come to know scarcity and poverty as normal and some people would have spread us even further into non colonised areas of the planet (of which there are plenty) and outer space to manage hence driving out/killing off the other animals who do live there, causing more soil erosion and changing the environments. It’s not like we’d go and live there sustainably, no we want to have the lifestyles that cause pollution and dead zones. We’d import ourselves, the animals, and plants we like/want/need and then do the same thing all over again. We can’t fix anything until we fix ourselves. We do need help but I don’t know who/what from and whilst I haven’t solved the initial conundrum – things are getting clearer.

Sidenote – Jupiter Ascending

Enki is known as a wisdom god (and hence William refers to him as such which made me remember this film), a ‘scientist’ or ‘chief engineer’ and obviously high level and who brings about the freedom of Inanna Queen of Heaven, and that the character Tammuz was her lover. Like with ‘the Passion of the Christ’ (2004) and notably witty casting of Jim Caviezel as Jesus Christ, Jupiter Ascending took that further. The main characters in that film were a mish mesh of names from different cultures, though many had British accents, in overlapping sequence e.g. Channing Tatum as Caine Wise (both the ‘mark of Cane’ and Enki the Wise, a ‘splice’ and a dog one like Joshua the educated avid reader and loner in tv series in Dark Angel, 2000-2002, who also ended up killing his brother). The actress Niki Amuka-Bird as Diomika Tsing or should we say Norse-Indian Demeter Singh played by a Black woman – Demeter being the mother goddess who rescues her daughter from the underworld in a later version of the Inanna story which then became the Ishtar version and then the Persephone version where she’s actually married to the God of the Underworld who by that time is male (Isis was also the Queen of Heaven and Quan/Guan Yin is also related to the story), Tuppence Middleton as Kalique a White skinned ‘Kali’, they very definitely made Jupiter a cleaner and since it’s the job of the Daughter (smaller/younger version of the Mother) to understand the suffering of creation though in practise that means others relish having her as an ignorant servant undermining any chance she has of rectifying the situation. Maximilian (many and long standing over the millennia Mother) Jones in Father form who just happens to have and pass on cosmic interest and in this film with the desired control of the Daughter the Mother-turned-Father is removed early and the false Mother shown as the real Mother due to birth is kept and used as insurance against the Daughter confusing the whole meta-narrative. And an actress that looks like the famous Tomb Raider i.e. someone who goes under/in-ground and revelations happen based off oh big surprise Indiana/Inanna Jones. And Balem I mean Baal as the mother killing son. They’ve basically ‘rescued’ the ‘Fallen Goddess’. Fallen Goddess – to Earth (the Underworld to Inanna) – Scenario so they could of used any Wisdom goddess or Sophia herself but no, that would be asking too much, they had to make her out to be pretty damned unsavoury instead being guilty of the crimes of human and Human/Sacred Worker-turned-God i.e. being predators and efficient ones making life into a business. Very modern.

A major and usually ignored issue with that is in the idea of other, stronger, more able predators they need to eat, need to snack, to consume, need their medicine, cosmetics, research carried out too – they’re just trying to live and you can’t blame them for that, do you expect them to wipe themselves out for their prey’s benefit? Would you get rid of humanity for the sake of all the animals that we commonly change the names of to disassociate them from what they were and then consume/use them (e.g. cow to beef, birds to poultry, pigs to pork), howabout for the sake of all the lab animals (professionals call those they test on ‘subjects’ which dehumanizes/deanimizes them and makes being result orientated easier), the endangered, extinct? Look at a body part picture of a cow and see how none of it is wasted. Everyone that eats veal and lamb can’t really complain to something that wants to eat their children right? Even if they streamline the ‘harvest’ and say only take a certain amount at spaced intervals, only a few, maybe even the ones we don’t want or offer up as a sacrifice, how about if they only take a bit from each so each sample can recover and live a healthy life afterwards? ‘To be fair’ they don’t have to be so nice but could farm and kill us humanely and even say ‘thank you Earth for this meal, I truly appreciate it and thank it for its life, it nobly gave up its life to keep the circle of life going’ and then ‘lovingly’ prepare the meal/youth product or whatever. As long as you’re sincere and thankful that makes it ok right? Nope? Well, had to ask. They have every right to live too don’t they if we’re all ‘god’s creatures’ (which is well up for debate), it’s not their fault (or is it) they’re atop of the convenient food chain/pyramid; we are mighty tasty, some of us even sweet, a delicacy, we should be honoured they desire us so much. That doesn’t float your boat either? Hmm like the saying goes if abattoirs had glass walls more people would be put off. They also like us for sexual purposes too and perhaps body snatching both us and other animals… That is – ‘mixed-race’ but it’s not ok when we put it like that is it. In the film the ‘something must be done’ is conveyed as ‘oops sh*t got smashed up big time as a side effect’, the usurping one’s creator-parent is still there but doesn’t go back far enough. The ‘do unto others as you would unto yourself’ aspect isn’t addressed, we’re told it’s just like slaughtering a herd of cattle or taking eggs from chickens but we’re never faced with the point that if we’re to have ‘justice’ over our slave masters then the same could/should happen to us. In the meantime (just some side irony here) some of them e.g. the competitors of the Abraxas (Abraxas implying archons from Gnosticism, which would ‘explain’ why the other aliens involved were beneath them) family are looking for pets to oo and ahh and ‘aren’t you SO cuuute!’ over, it comes with totally adorable habitats free plus clothes, toys and all the food you can eat. Any takers? 😉

The reincarnation through exact genetics was interesting, not something I’ve heard before and reminds me of cloning but there were so many unexplained plotholes for the sake of a Fifth Element (film, 1997, where the rescued goddess figure is played by another Mila-named actress) mega love distraction undoing all the profound parallel that humans treat other animals in the same ways they’d protest to on this ironic farm/prison planet of abundance where no creature should be homeless of hungry and what it’s like to see shop displays of food or shelter and not understanding why you aren’t allowed near, why you’re ‘vermin’ and even exterminated for being cold and hungry like that’s the crime rather than the fact that there shouldn’t be masses of vulnerable at all let alone with everything paraded in their face. Also the fifth element is not love as they well know and in this day and age quite frankly life force can easily just be hormones which can ironically and terribly be increased/decreased manually in a body regardless of a person’s judgement/consciousness. She was supposed to clean up on the macro scale not go back to the cage leaving everything as it is for what a boyfriend getting his wings back and being able to fly around in anti-gravity boots?

At least up until the ending Jupiter was extraordinary; impressive balance between an ‘average person’ and someone super strong, she handled the situation with exceptional fortitude, bearing and intelligence, far better and with more conscience than many in nowhere near such a situation. As for all those wondering how the Queen of the [location] could be a cleaner and looking down on her for it – how much housework do you think the royal family has done and look at how popular they are. Look down on yourself for cleaning up your homes and for the people you care about, or all the cleaners who clean up after us. It reminds me of the aristocracy in the US who are so proud that their ancestors arrived on the Mayflower and at not being one of the people they sent ahead to do their dirty work. Although at least the film showed that even the one man wrecking machine Caine needed help, everybody does no one is an island.

I found it strange though that a US film had the protagonist from a Russian family and the British accents of her helpers. Also, due to the honey bee comparison I’ve heard some think honey is representative of blood, more specifically plasma. Blood isn’t the only life force, each part of the animal body has a function (as we know because we use body parts in our own medical treatments and indeed ritual magic) and symbolism; the colour and texture of the ‘fountain of youth’ bath in conjunction with the symbolism of the bees suggests to me that honey represents the ooplasma in ovum and that was the avenue to finding Jupiter, that and/or possibly the female vaginal fluids i.e. mucus, white blood cells, remains of old cells and a liquid that is like sweat (but unless filtered the bath was more water like).

The end scene shows Venus and Mercury together in the sky or Venus as Mercury – Inanna (who they’ve called Jupiter) is depending on which culture you look at was the morning and/or evening star, and the flying boots represent Mercury/Hermes. Caine wore them when he didn’t have his wings otherwise he would have been the winged messenger. It’s an awkward (the film is) telling of the story and I would have preferred Ninshubur (Inanna’s assistant) shown and her and Inanna rather than a twist of Inanna and Caine/Dumuzi (the earlier version of Tammuz). Dumuzi was supposed to be taken to the underworld and left there.

And another thing

The whether to believe scenario has heightened for people with the [finally] admitted existence of Nibiru and I’m not one of the people that is clinging to something just in case or for certainty as to what will happen but I don’t know what the admittance and multiple theories about its orbit means, especially when it’s closest to Earth and its effects as it leaves. I just feel ignorant even with all the info of its past effects. I just think = this planet and all its residents, all their hopes and fears concentrated…

Here’s a screenshot from perhaps an old favourite of many:

Dark Crystal 1982 3 suns

Dark Crystal, 1982, based on a book. this is approx 4min in. Bear in mind that their planet has three suns which reminds me of Sol, Saturn and the Nibiru system.

Dark Crystal 1982 Aughra

My fave character btw is Aughra the astronomer/oracle, she was so awesome and a proper short, fat, horned crone like we see from root cultures.

Dark Crystal 1982 Aughra Observatory Orrery Cosmos Space

Her orrery

Dark Crystal 1982 Aughra facing the skeksis

Aughra telling the Skeksis they’re fools. They destroy her observatory and imprison her.

Poignant isn’t it, the same old story and packed into boy meets girl/girl meets boy for some reason, most likely that obsession with immortality and inheritance/or calling it inheritance (‘that person believed/did/had enough for the rest of us’ mentality) as usual but in a more ‘acceptable’ version for people.


I’d written the bulk of this post but didn’t know where it was going, much like my conundrum. I knew I was leaning on the side of being against ‘destiny’ whatever plan that is of other people, or various people’s competing plans but I was trying to keep an open mind.

Whilst I disagreed with or felt uncomfortable about some of William Bond’s words there was a lot I identified with and knew I sounded similar the only real difference being he was confident in the future, in his certainties of it whereas I didn’t and still don’t, but that’s ok because I’m certain of me in my present.

I’ve also just read a book that reminded me of the tv show ‘Early Edition’ (review HERE) where the main character is at a crossroads and suddenly receives a ‘calling’, he doesn’t know anything about the people behind this higher purpose but they know when & where he is and how to use him. They make him help and rescue other people, to be an unsung hero, a ‘real’ everyday hero who could put glorified heroes to shame but they know everything and so have control over him, they could turn him in (probably to people who work under their level) and have him ruined as a vigilante, he’s a Manchurian Candidate waiting to happen. They operate with military precision, in secrecy; through coercion, intimidation, thrill and reward and ultimately they orchestrate the situations so as to groom/create the characters they want for their ongoing storylines. The view is to make people into better people, more caring people, giving them a hard yet doable choice to get past apathy and walk the walk. The protagonist doesn’t have convictions, he’s a smart alec with even more cynical and droll friends (except one) and demanding/mouthy bosses/families, they mostly don’t have goals and are listlessly going through an unsatisfactory life; they’re bored, disappointed and frustrated. The protagonist shows serious potential after piquing the interest of a controller type character and gets the chance to change things. It’s not leading or living by example, to show people they can do the same since it’s covert but the book bills it that way. The problem is the controller is playing both or all sides, creating conflict, trauma that both desensitizes people and drives a few others wanting it to stop but not being strong enough to do something about it unless pushed further. The over arching theme is romantic/sexual relations, yearning for it, hiding from it, abusing it. As a constant reminder and by using it as a reward the protagonist sees the tougher challenges as bearable and even worth it, tinting the perspective so he believes it is his calling even though he learns the situations are manufactured. The author might as well have said ‘pain and suffering for the greater good’.

You know how we’re told we can’t prioritize who gets treated first based on who is crying the loudest, it’s not always true but from what I’ve seen (and in this book) some who’ve suffered the worst suffered in [near] silence because they couldn’t (in so much pain) or wouldn’t for numerous reasons including not wanting to be a burden or seen as weak and hence increasing their chances of being left behind yet quietly hoping someone would notice their plight. That kind of thing just can’t continue, no one should have to fear being left behind or forgotten and no one should be sacrificed/have to sacrifice themselves for the sake of the many who wouldn’t/couldn’t go through the same let alone want to know about it (when they do it’s usually for the salacious feeling of intel/gossip rather than sympathy/empathy, and any of which is temporary, quickly fading for the next story.

I’ve come across enough loss to see that others can be used as a satellites; horrible things happening to them in order to get a reaction out of another like they only matter because you care about them. Like they’re toys. Like they’re nothing unless they’re acknowledged. I hate that. It’s not easy being the one left behind bearing the burden either or being in a situation where you remember and many around don’t for various reasons such as trauma, medication and indoctrination; nor when those who know what happened remind you of it to make it harder sometimes using others similar to those lost for re-enactment. People with the personalities, drive, ability and resources to make things happen and they choose this tailspin of drama and relief (when you’ve been greatly frustrated or upset over a long period of time even a little relief at moments can make things seem much better, make you feel able to continue and that’s the rub because if it does continue you’re used to it). And all for what – to feel like they’re creating, doing something, making progress? With ability like that they could make things better themselves, not worse to get possibly better via someone else – do they sit around betting on the results? I don’t condone it, not at all. Even if I don’t know what I believe in, I know what I don’t; I don’t believe we exist to be players and pawns and that disbelief is belief enough.