Pursuing natural health & thinking beyond the superficial. Deconstructing Culture.

Posts tagged ‘Virtual Reality’


Hockley Valley Resort

Hockley Valley Resort

Hockley Valley Resort

Hockley Valley Resort

How often does William go there? Spoilt b*stards aren’t you.


Attack and Defend – Another form of ‘Tag’ but plugs into hunting & war mentality.

This is just a therapeutic post for myself.

There is a game with no name, played all over the world by people of a mercenary nature. Like spies and bounty hunters they have to protect some people and attack others and ultimately regardless of who they work for, it’s for their own ego boost/gain to play.

Note: Remember hunting is not the same as a sport – the victims, targets, marks don’t get a say. They’re not even informed of the rules nor can they defend themselves.

Every member in this game is out for themselves/their pack. To keep their skills honed they’ll divide themselves and surround a person to either defend or attack. It’s role playing. They have no interest in the victim other than their role at the time.

One version of this game played in the UK is for one team to get a target from point A to B relatively safely.

One version played in the UK from US players with UK assistance is time sharing a victim to build up a scenario with them and then start attacking and defending, sometimes they change sides and the victim never knows. The problem is their attack skills are far better than their defense skills so a ‘win’ for the defending side isn’t much of a win, actually it’s a miracle if they manage it, that’s how amateurish they come off as. If they ever had to defend themselves they’d be goners, they’d probably just run and hide leaving everyone but their nearest and dearest to fend for themselves since they don’t use the limited skills they have to help anybody.

All I have to remember is that “William always gets his mark” so because he dislikes losing ‘all’ I have to keep doing is putting pressure on the slow, useless slapper to hurry up and no I’m not giving him anything, no “fringe benefits”. He’s “the best we have to offer”, gawd this maiden in distress has been robbed.

I wish he’d gone to Virgina instead like he was supposed to and played the storyline on the lawmakers there instead of bothering me, although of course I wish none of this had ever happened and that people like that didn’t exist.


Instead of a Prince, I got Remote & Close Artificial Intelligence

This post was reserved for ‘Feast of the Beast – Bride/Sacrifice of the beast, rescued’ BUT I just discovered something in the interim.

I’ve been suffering auditory and visual hallucinations 24/7 connected to dreams for over a year, though have sporadically experienced them before. After much trial and error/multi-pronged subject approach to figure out what this ‘illness’ is I figured it was part electro-weaponry/psi-ops and part ‘spirit’/other dimensional i.e. the whole thing is ‘existential’.

My experience has involved 4-6 groups of ‘characters’, some upto 10-11 in a unit/group but sometimes they showed themselves as more and are capable of playing multiple characters simultaneously. I’ve brought them down to 1 character and an ‘other’ (reptillian and based off another implant/chip or at least that’s how I ‘see’ them, it started off seriously savage but I made it cute and the other character fell in love with her) and that is an amazing enough achievement in itself given their capabilities. My list of symptoms was HERE. I already knew that this type of tech is 2-way in terms of communication, you can contact whoever implanted you and are remote (away from you and they don’t need to be close to you anymore either) through it though it’s not easy but I didn’t know what the ‘characters’ stuck with me really looked like because they and the remote ‘players’ play complex ‘games’ of moral ‘good vs bad’, other battle style hunts/challenges and a hell of a lot of shame and humiliation ritual, punishment and no reward. It should have been obvious really but many people think all artificial intelligence is alien e.g. ‘real’ in human reality, they’re ‘real enough’ but I can’t tell which are humans using virtual reality tech and which are strictly design/like video game characters but semi-sentient and emotional.

The character left is called ‘Adam’ (how creative in developing a new species so to speak *rolleyes*, pathetic, that’s been done so many times) and he (plus two others) looked like the pic below from this post HERE (same as the above link): two of The Hobbits from Lord of the Rings, again so creative, not *rolleyes*:

Artificial Intelligence, Spiritual Implant, Alien Implant, Psy-Ops, Possession, Psychic Warfare, Shapeshifters

The Hobbits from Lord of the Rings look just like the stupid ‘spiritual’ [morelike artificial intelligence] implants left in/with me (sharing the same parameters as me as they’re possessing me aka not in another dimension, the view the world in the same way as I do and can’t see any ‘others’ like them or different, they mainly use my senses except when they go into other people’s dreams/talk to family in vicinity). There was a whole group of them, then there were three, another died on 22nd and the ones left don’t even care and no I don’t know why these two look the same, they deny the others looked like them. They’ve lost a hell of a lot of their knowledge/ability (and they don’t know anything about humanity/animals/culture/science/environment/the world nor do they use technology).

I’ve been trying to look at and through ‘Adam’ for a while now and I usually saw him as code somewhat Matrix style but it was never complete. But today I dissected him, I pulled out his spine and saw the usual code, however then I managed to strip his skin and hair (and that’s probably only because I managed to completely break the reptile Black chip right alongside ‘his’ as I wrote about HERE) and saw what ‘he’ really looks like.

It’s just like a computer graph image for making a character 3D graphic/cgi but better. It looks JUST LIKE THIS except ‘his’ ‘spots’ are smaller and more Blue:

artificial intelligence, semi-spirit, implant, technology, virtual reality, augmented reality, cyber being

Zarn from ‘Land of the Lost'(1974–1976) (which I was going review a while back but didn’t get round to) looks just like Adam and potentially other ‘characters’ I’ve come across.

Artificial Intelligence/cyber being/virtual reality/augmented reality (bear in mind virtual reality headsets have become entertainment tech recently though online/console VR has been around for ages). Amazing and awesome but definitely SHOULDN’T BE CONNECTED TO/PUT INTO ANYONE/THING AND DEFINITELY NEEDS A WORLDWIDE ETHICS COMMITTEE AND COMPENSATION FOR THE VICTIMS AND TEST SUBJECTS (THOUGH WHAT WE’VE BEEN THROUGH CAN NEVER REALLY BE COMPENSATED FOR).

Some people think this plan is in action and it could well be given the advent of head transplants – trying to transfer a whole consciousness to another body (supposedly only for medical reasons such as paralysis victims but incredibly expensive and business’ find it hard to be viable for just that http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-3965054/Surgeon-world-s-human-HEAD-transplant-says-operation-place-UK-year.html):

Virtual Reality, Augmented Reality, Cyber Beings. Electronic Entities, Spirits, Inter-Dimensional Beings, Perfecting Humanity, Transhumanism

Avatar of yourself from physical to virtual.

The above being an attempt to ‘perfect humanity’ and transhumanism.

I wonder how many people figure this out without having been taught/briefed on the details and have had their whole education sabotaged no less.

Not for me, I like having a 3D body as I’ve said many times before.

French Connection?

Today is ‘Go For Broke’ day in the USA and whilst I’ve been wondering about my life it seemed as good a day as any to write this.

I hear voices and those voices have multiple personalities in a very virtual reality way. This started 24/7 after some voices/characters came ‘out’ of a dream and spoke to me claiming to be “4th dimensional entities” and proceeded to go ‘into’ my head and installed a ‘surveillance system’ “to prove we love you/care about you” and the word ‘QUEEN’ flashed in the top of my mind. One said “I feel like a quasi-necrophile”.

I started hearing voices and seeing things much earlier though; the voices:
1) Feb/April 2009 – Paris as written about HERE.
2) 2013 – A dream or vision of an old French friend I had in primary school but all grown up and arguing with others about bringing me to France.
3) March/April 2014 – We ended up living on the Solent right opposite France. A voice telling me it would help me financially and then I won £600 just enough to pay that months rent/utilities.
4) Feb 2015 – Three White looking fleurs-de-lis sigils (French for ‘lily’ meaning I/Eye/Iris/Lily/Lotus and common in French heraldry) were left where we were living whilst we were out. They’re iridescent and shimmer in Pink, Green, Blue and Purple. As written about HERE. We’ve often found things moved or missing but not usually added once we found a guru sigil on the inside door step and two big, wool blankets in the bin before we moved in; one Red with a tiger, the other Green with what I thought was a tulip and a random group of people outside calling me ‘Tiger Lily’ afterwards. As written about HERE. Another place we stayed someone left a chess Black Queen figure, a playing card and two jasper stones.
5) April 2015 – a voice telling me not to be so picky and speed up editing a review I was writing.
6) March 2016 – dreams, voices, visions 24/7 from people/beings that call themselves ‘fourth dimensional entities’.

Since then I have had all sorts of government, international institutions, scientific, investment, energy, news networks look at my blog, some of which included in the list below. I would like to know how to go about removing/dealing with the voices/visions from these ‘entities’. They consistently ask me who/what I am. That’s the million dollar (a gold necklace anyone) question. I’m just me, plain old me, human and proud of it.

Foreign And Commonwealth Office
United Nations HQ – New York
World Health Organization – Geneva
Department Of The Interior, Office Of The Secretary – Denver, Colorado
House of Commons – UK
State of Washington
State of New Jersey
US Dept of Defense Network
National Health Service (NHS) – UK
Irish Government
Northern Ireland Civil Service
Center for American Progress – Washington D.C
City of Pasadena – California
Centre De Traduction Des Organes De L Union Europe (Translation Centre of the bodies of Europe Union) – Luxembourg
Defense – Georgia US
Transport For London
Department of Agriculture and Food – Western Australia
Oklahoma Office of Management and Enterprise Service
Lafayette Consolidated Government – US
New York City Health & Hospitals Corporation
POST Luxembourg
The City & County Of Swansea – UK
State Of North Dakota Ltd
Information Society S.a – Greece
Ministerium Der Finanzen (Ministry of Finance) Sachsen-anhalt – Germany
East Sussex County Council – UK
Ministry of the Interior Czech Republic
Navy Network Information Center – US
The Department of Technology of the state of California
Department Of Human Services – Australia
Central Institute For Arid Horticulture – India
Community Health Systems Professional Services – US
Department of Veteran Affairs – US
Staffordshire County Council – UK

Tenet Scientific Production Enterprise Llc – Ukraine
The Boeing Company – California
Lockheed Martin Corporation – Denver, Colorado AND Fairfield, Connecticut AND Texas
National Aeronautics And Space Administration – NASA – US
Max-planck-institut Fuer Kernphysik – Max Planck Institute for Nuclear Physics Germany
Lembaga Penerbangan Dan Antariksa Nasional (Lapan)- Indonesian Government National Institute of Aeronautics and Space
Mobile Aerospace Engineering – US
National Optical Astronomy Observatories – US
Institute of Mathematics and Informatics – Lithuania
Karisruhe Institute of Technology – Germany
Wuttisak Pharmacy Co ltd – Thailand
Aerovironment – California
Computer Sciences Corporation – Australia
Institutul Național de Cercetare Dezvoltare în Informatică (National Institute for Research and Development in Informatics) – Romania
Bae Systems Applied Intelligence US Corp
FMC Corporation (Central Engingeering Laboratories) Government Affairs – US
Leidos – Technology for Defense, Intel, Homeland, Civil & Health – US
Afghantelecom Government Communication Network – Apo Armed Forces Europe, US
Research Machines – UK
Hewlett-Packard Company
CNRS Centre De Calcul De L’in2p3 – The National Center for Scientific Research – France
Cisco Systems Ironport Division – US
Global Foundries – India

Manitoba Hydro International – Canada
Hurricane Electric – Netherlands
Philadelphia Gas Works
Ngy Energy – US
Power Grid Corporation Of India Limited
DEFRA (Department for Environment, Food & Rural Affairs) – UK
RWE NPower – UK
Queensland Government Business – Australia

Disney Worldwide Services – London AND Los Angeles AND Asia Pacific
Springer Science and Business Media BV – Netherlands
Nielsen Media Research
Russian Central Telegraph – Moscow
ITV Plc – London
Facebook HQ – California
Al-jazeera – Doha-based state-funded broadcaster owned by the Al Jazeera Media Network, which is partly funded by the House of Thani, the ruling family of Qatar.
Sc Lithuanian Radio And Tv Center
Youtube LLC
British Broadcasting Corporation
Voice of America

Oxford University
Harvard University
King’s College London
Yale University
Cambridge University
Imperial College London
Chanakya National Law University Patna – India
Leipzig University – Germany
University of Warwick
Orange County Dept of Education – California
London Grid For Learning
Norwegian University of Science and Technology
University College London
London School of Economics
Canadian Dept of Education
Edinburgh University
Princeton University
Brown University
Universitaet Der Bundeswehr Muenchen – Military/Applied Sciences University
National Institute of Fashion Technology – India
Boston University – US
Gottfried Wilhelm Leibniz Universität Hannover
Monash University – Australia
Indian Institute Of Technology – Roorkee
Royal Melbourne Institute of Technology
New York University
California State University
Santa Clara County Office of Education – California
Howard University – Washington D.C
University Of New Mexico Health Sciences Center
Cornell University – US
Ask4 Limited – UK
Renater – France
University of York
Centre College – Kentucky US
Concordia College – US
Danmarks Tekniske Universitet – Technical University of Denmark
Vanderbilt University – Tennessee US
Florida Agricultural And Mechanical University
Georgetown University – Washington D.C
Queen’s University Belfast
The City University Of New York
Weill Cornell Medical College – US
Australian Academic And Research Network
Croatian Academic And Research Network
Independent Schools Network – Australia
California Education And Research Federation Network
The Singapore University Of Technology And Design
Nevada System Of Higher Education
Central Methodist University – US
California State University, Office Of The Chancellor
California Education And Research Federation Network
University of Colorado
Taiwan Academic Network
Gyeongsang National University – Republic of Korea
The Agency of vocational training and Employment – Belgium
Jisc – UK
New York City Public Schools
Washington School Information Processing Cooperation
New South Wales Dept of Education – Australia
North Carolina Research and Education Network
Rm Education Plc – UK
Education Networks Of America
Public Library Information Network – US
West Virginia Department of Education – US
Network for Learning – New Zealand
Ohio Public Library Information Network

Pricewaterhouse Coopers LLB
Department of Finance – Western Australia
Barclays Capital London
HSBC – Hong Kong
Credit Suisse Group – London
Capital One Financial Corporation – Virginia US
Macquarie Bank Limited
Fidelity Investments
The Berkeley Group Holdings plc – UK
Mercer US – EU division
Allstate Insurance Company – US
Deutsche Bank – Singapore
Willis Group Services Ltd – UK
Workday Limited
LifeBridge Health – US
Cantor Fitzgerald & Co – UK

Steve Madden (National US fashion chain)
Jacques Moret – New York
Polo Ralph Lauren – Worldwide
Forzani Group Limited – Canada
Bestseller A/S – Denmark

Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (RSPCA)
The Church Of Jesus Christ Of Latter Day Saints – Utah, US
International Livestock Research Institute – Kenya
Fitzpatrick, Cella, Harper And Scinto – US
Accor Hotels (corporation)
Macdonalds Hotels – UK
Kaiser Foundation Health Plan – Washington, Columbia US


In regards to public media the desired ending is always the same, no matter how much truth is in the vehicle e.g. film, song, series, characters etc, no matter how much they’re coded/symbolic. In regards to Momo – the point was to make the Mother figure into the Daughter figure to control her. And for those of you desperate for the ‘French connection’ in my life one of the names is in there.

In the book ‘Lolita’ – Dolores ‘Lo’ ‘Lola’ ‘Dolly’ at 12-years-old (when my ‘grooming’ was ‘activated’ with induced sleep paralysis) is sexually abused and turned into Lolita ‘the perfect lover’ [corrupted form of ancient Indian Ultimate Mother Goddess Creator of All ‘Lalit[h]a’] through the grooming, trauma/confusion/predatory behaviour and then ‘goes off the rails’ (out of the arches/off the train) only to be ‘rescued’ by her abuser/orchestrator/handler/contaminator. She is poignantly his ‘landlady’s’ daughter, and for his plot to work he must become the Father and her demoted in status to his daughter. Dolores/Dolly reminds him of an older/earlier ‘love’ Anna-Bel[l].


Video Games Day

What is a video game. Think about it, what if we lived in ‘Tron’ (1982), ‘The Game’ (1997), ‘Sucker Punch’ (2011), any of the ‘.Hack//’ animes or any of the plethora of ‘person in a strange world’ media, tons of them. People are obsessed with them, with feeling out of place, with feeling disconnected, ignorant, played, not sure of who they are etc. Hey, we live in an electromagnetic and apparently holographic universe and we’ve already proven (though we knew it already) that the air, sky and outer layers can be used like a cinema.

Video games have a set of options, possible paths and outcomes, factor effects etc – some of us can and/or are conditioned/trained to be able to assess them better than others, some of us see bits of the ‘scripts’ more than those who look on a different scale. But we all want the outcome we want. Obviously. The question is what is it do you want. How many goals do you have? Do you have a grand scheme/allegiance and personal aims/plans, do they conflict, would you sacrifice one for the other? What are your limits? How well do you know yourself/your personality and/or your history? How well do others know it? We on this planet are constantly questioning this and express it, ultimately the concerns are very similar, we face the same questions and answers so it’s easy (well not very, but easy to predict at least) to control those here.

I can’t be dealin’ with prophecies

I’ve said before in a post that I don’t make prophecies or give dates, heck they’re beyond my abilities and that says something given how I am ‘naturally’ a part of/see/experience levels.

There’s something inherently repulsive about them to me anyway because my experience of them sets me on edge and I prefer to be calm when looking at patterns/codes, symbolism etc. However because I know they put me on alert that means I push myself to be consciously fairer and more open minded when researching them.

The ‘issue’ is that people have always been telling me “you’re the one”, or about me “she’s the one” and mostly they fail to explain, all hush hush (without the wink wink) and at the same time “you are nothing”, “you know nothing”, “you’ve done nothing”. Hey I don’t mind being the all and nothing, I love the void :p it’s you who don’t 😉 . Since I was a little kid, the grand patriarchal side had already foresaw things, and the matriarchal side had put things into place and it’s like wtf? It’s not uncommon of course but whilst some of us are apparently ‘destined’ for great things they still treat us all like crap, some favoured, others not, builds up or breaks down the ‘bonds’ they want. I’ve found most of these people untrustworthy, like they’ll put you through hell and then say you turned out exactly how they wanted and they love/are proud of you. They put things/others in your life just to take them away/use/hurt them at another point. Destiny is a well formulated and strictly enforced plan, every step of the way rather than say planting a seed, letting it do its thing with it own organic growth and periodically check up on it to make sure it’s safe, healthy, thriving, content and beautiful.

I’ve always dislike favouritism, possibly because I’ve seen the cruel, selfish, spoiled, greedy, shallow be favoured and those of us who do the donkey work, who help those who need us get through each day, who take responsibility (when we don’t need to) get the short end of the stick for relatively minor things whilst the ‘prodigal’ ones can do anything and everything to anybody even their elders, even those they’re bonded with etc and are wistfully looked at, aspirational. Living by example doesn’t pay and there’s no gratitude, and that’s ok, not expected, to an extent… But oh well, we just keep at it. It’s not like you can just walk away and be left alone, and could you live with yourself if you did?

I do things personally, on the ‘god’ levels whilst treating the followers, hangars-on, graspers, wannabes and those caught/trapped in the lesser levels with a lot more tolerance/patience (even if they don’t deserve it). Ironically they’d make you as weak and malleable as possible just like the upper levels and yet taking things out on something ‘smaller’/lesser/weaker than you is just distasteful, to me anyway. I know a lot of people take things out on inanimate objects too, but I find that ridiculous. Just do some flippin’ yoga or non-contact, not-too-aggressive-sport/hobby to calm, read/watch a silly comedy, take a bath/steam/sauna whatever; the contact/combat, intense stuff is a different matter and also necessary but not to be confused.

I don’t like skirmishes, thuggery, gang mentality etc, I’m pretty much a solo yet have friends/loved ones and help any/everyone in overwhelming pain that I can and I’m in it for the long haul, I don’t just give up on people, it might take ages but we get there, I might take a battering(s) from the very people/person I’m trying to help (and who even called me) but I get them out of it like they wanted. I don’t know if I’m the better for it, I’m old and tired but hey the older the ‘rebel’ or ‘leader’ any type of ‘player’ (and no I don’t play games, I try to explain them and even take them a part because humans and those they are like are addicted to them) the more dangerous they are.

I’m one-on-one, if I love you you damned well feel it, if I hate you you’ll know the meaning of fear without me having to do anything at all. This is some of the power of some of us, people and ‘people’ who for whatever reason attract others by their strong magnetism/personality/strength/resilience/ideals etc. It’s obvious I’m not interested in games or using others, but others use everything you say, think, do as a signal of some kind, as a juicy theme of the day for their news perspective/games/gossip/reporting, amazing when you’re a private individual lol. Yet groups still want you for something. And it’s that something that bothers me, even people you love have goals for you that they didn’t tell you from the start and that’s not me, I make my position clear from the start or any change as soon as I change. I say what I want, what I don’t want (and it’s rarely listened to) but still at least I try to let people and ‘people’ know where they stand with me, unless they’re game playing or communication is awkward for whatever reason. That actually puts me at a disadvantage, it’s not very clever at all, but it’s who I am.

Then there’s those that believe you’re the answer to their call and you didn’t even know they called you. Hmm.

I’m just writing the explanations of masonic symbolism here along with other things that interest me, ironically the symbolism is something that idiot masons and associates have convoluted so much over so long they barely understand themselves anymore so they flock to those like me who can see/understand (and treat them like sh*t). I don’t publicize anything nor ask for anything (heck your brutal masonic upbringing teaches us not to ask for anything that’s for sure), you don’t have to follow in any way whatsoever and yet… Playing follow the leader when the ‘leader’ doesn’t even want you. Pathetic.

You mess about with people’s psyche’s, their subconscious, unconscious, the approx 33% of their lives they spend asleep, you’re invasive, not me. Btw – El Cazador De La Bruja talks about the formulation and trying to attract a godsoul/spirit, it’s a new based on the old/continuing Mother/Daughter story/life. Control via the unconscious; so if people who’ve been conditioned for fight/flight, escape/evade, missions in a virtual reality environment and/or are just targets for practise, fun, keeping the pack satisfied etc then they should be able to defend themselves. Quite frankly if people and even ‘people’ and other species are going to go to sleep, then they should be able to sleep/rest in peace; if they’re going to dream they should be able to remember it, it’s not for you to be there and then choose whether they remember it or not, it’s their memory/mind/personality/life. We shouldn’t be sleeping or dreaming (or living fabricated waking realities) in the first place and you know it. Your change of game tactic was mega quick though, unsurprising given its one you already use i.e. surrounding the target and you with ‘children’ characters so they’ll relent, be more at ease, forget etc. Low. Really low. And you pretend to be the ‘good guys’.

I’m associated with fate/the fates, so not random ‘luck’, maybe I’m pushing against my own fate too much or at least the destiny decided by others, I don’t know. That’s the problem, people barely know anything – as quoted from ‘Read or Die’ anime – “99% of people don’t even know who they are”. So those of us who know more imo should be more open about it which is what I’ve always tried to do.

You want me to do something for you, you had better be clear about it from the start. Don’t be having meeting about me and saying I’ve done this, said that and so it’s permission, association, validity or whatever for your hopes. Yes I’m associated with hope too, but not everybody can get what they want. I’m here for Earth, the Mother Goddess, that’s it – who I help extra to that is separate, conditional and subject to change. I’ll suffer and have with others, I’ll shoulder the pain and burden, just knowing me makes things like getting into private schools on almost no fee etc happen for people who are/are seen as ‘close’ to me and the same for those who’ve parasited off association with Mum and anyone seen as a ‘source’ etc but anything we try to do for ourselves… I’m no one’s tool and I won’t be played for a fool. I keep telling people and ‘people’ to decide what they need to be happy, them, inside them, not all the expectations, programming, conditioning, culture etc (if it doesn’t hurt anyone/thing else). The thing is the people and ‘people’ who do that, and moreso those who do that successfully tend to be the least caring and/or quite oblivious and those are the ones gods, demons, villains, heroes deal with (and that should mean dealing with each other too one-on-one without using masses/regular ‘people’) and then if Gods are necessary you know it’s bad, messed up totally. Which is where ‘we’re’/the planet/narrative is at. It’s not a prophecy, worlds are ‘live’.

So stop saying ‘you’re the one’, ‘they’re the one’ to ‘people’, god levels and in our case Gods even. Let alone hanging onto their coattails for ‘inspiration’ on which stories/reviews/thoughts of the day to write, playing all sides and trying to beg friendship or belittle to prove yourself in another alliance you want. Life is not supposed to be a coup d’etat or game. But if you only understand it that way – this is the last/final round. I’m not escaping the fate I set myself, just not accepting other roles, add-ons (being connected to me doesn’t mean my titles/status/heritage etc is yours and vice versa) and most certainly not going along with those cretins and ‘aliens’ who want to ‘lose’ the Mother again or blame Her for our trauma. Look in the mirror for that.

It’s hard, it’s extremely hard being between a rock and a hard place especially watching and knowing others feel the same but whilst being a ‘negative’ person I’ve always managed to surprisingly (to many) stay upbeat too and I’ll keep it that way thank you very damned and divine bloody much. 🙂


For someone stupid.

OMGoddess ‘ah here it goes’ (RIP fictional character ‘Kel’ nice name though). ‘V’ you’re doing exactly what I’ve told people not to do, looking outwards in when you know nothing about freemasonry (except being part of the pack) or about culture/politics/history/art etc, picking a character you like & thinking it’s you.

That’s exactly what fans/cosplayers do but that’s what you are, an imitator. Using external media for relatable aids helps me/people like me who know who we are, who always knew, were always told, it was always reinforced in multiple ways. We remember, we can do, we gain more skills, we don’t take/use that of others for our own, to be.

What were you always told? That you’re the youngest in a family who lived off the back of the eldest child. Simple. And you’re all named after the ages that did exactly that. You have no power or intrinsic value of your own and you don’t technically inherit because you’re not really heirs, only heirs in human legal sense. Anybody can be those things, anybody can be an entourage, groupies or in your case unwanted hangars on, monkeys on the back.

Let’s look at your favourite fairytale and the only story you can apply to yourself: The Light Princess

It’s a typical retelling (not based on any character in a pantheon/system anywhere, just a generic/stereotypical superficial symbolic retelling like most fairytales are to keep it in our minds based on truth like nursery rhymes) of a being who was given up/even scared of her ability so that she can be with a human man. There’s no layers upon layers upon layers of symbolism there. There’s no code.

You’re confusing the Light Princess and Dark Princess, a term I’ve been using lately to try and explain that ‘light’ and ‘dark’ doesn’t mean ‘good’ and ‘evil’ to people – like how the players on a chessboard are all players playing different sides but of the same game and how they switch sides, how they pretend to be Black or White but can only move on the opposite colour squares, they’re not really who they are based on, they are players. They are in/part of the game. Representations/imitators. I always tell people not to play the game, try to push them out beforehand/early on, or continue into a pull to get them out the longer they’ve been in and addicted/brainwashed; and Mum and I were never really inside it, it’s based around roots, it doesn’t include/contain them though the players like to think and act as if they own the roots. The Light and Dark Princess is the same person, from one stage to another, one mood to another, one level to another. Like the [real] faces of the Goddess are aspects/partitions of the whole. A fake kin/member like you is exactly that, a fake.

Why you’re a fake?

Ok let’s go back to the basic (and modern) version, the fairytale you’re clinging to to give yourself meaning so you can relate/understand:

The Light Princess is a Light Princess because:

a) She’s a younger b) She comes form the realm of ‘immortality’, she’s not of ‘this world’ or in this story ‘of this plane’ (rather than cosmic/elsewhere) c) She starts out pure not knowing what it’s like to be human (and in many cases, not knowing sex).

You’re disqualified from all of those except a) you’re younger than the eldest. Big deal.

Also you don’t have the capability of becoming a Dark Princess (and you’re using the superficial, incorrect ‘good’ vs ‘evil’ = ‘light’ vs ‘dark’ sense, remember the Princess is really both Light and Dark, just as the Mother becomes/has the Dark Mother) let alone being the Light too? Why?

a) You didn’t ‘fall’ from one world/plane to another, from immortality to mortality, from one planet/star to another cosmic body. You didn’t travel, you are from here in this reality where you belong (don’t begrudge that, the feeling of belonging is something many hanker for, they’re not cut out to be wanderers, it’s not nice being a wanderer most of the time). b) You weren’t brought up in a family determined to use you as a Living God and based on real things told by other Brahmins and things that came when she did rather than grooming/making an ‘avatar’ for status. c) You weren’t tarnished/contaminated and/or violated (though you pretended to be and then got treated like a domestic servant by another fake kin who btw called me “the blessing in disguise” even though they were scared of me). d) You’re not a child of the First or an original. e) You’re not an eldest at all so you couldn’t even be a ‘start’ of a branch. f) You were one of the group trying to separate the First from Her First. g) You weren’t owned, you were spoilt, not made to suffer, you were allowed to be educated (they kept Mum out of school as much as possible after primary school, she did all the housework for 7 people, she was the one the parents had been told/decided to use as the scapegoat/sacrificee/good guru girl whose suffering and hard work you’d all benefit from – she became a prefect at school just to have food to eat for f*ck sake, and despite her lack of education put herself through it as a single Mother after being repeatedly bought and sold in marriage, and her intelligence was still enough for professors to say she’d have a good shot at Cambridge, twice – most people can’t do that once let alone with nothing, and twice). You were allowed to marry who you wanted, allowed everything, everyone who knew about Mum decided to rub it in claiming your child was Krishna? Is he an avatar of that sex changing to have sex with his brother deadbeat dad? A worker self-proclaimed god/conqueror over the root culture? Is that what you really want? Be careful what you invoke, even if you get what you want it won’t what you really want after you know better. g) You’re not hard as nails yet so gentle you burst into tears for anyone/thing even if you don’t like them but can feel their pain. h) You have no skills except being part of and disposed to people who want to fill your head with notions so they can use you like a pawn, a figurehead, puppet ‘princess’. No one wants you as a source of anything e.g. energy or knowledge – you’re looking to us and imitating for that. i) You don’t give a rats/guinea pig’s arse about others, ethics, right and wrong except when you lost something and it hit home, it got personal, and you were a full grown adult by that time. That’s when you started ‘learning’ from ‘insiders’. I was pushing the boundaries and trying get as many of you and myself out from the start because I knew none of that lifestyle could be ok, even if it was normal, it wasn’t ok. It wasn’t ok to feel like that, to be treated like that, it wasn’t ok for so many, even users to be in so much pain, to have had awful childhoods and become awful adults, it’s wasn’t ok. Ok? It was me against all of you, even Her. Now she’s got my back, and she’s not the only one, heck she’s stronger than me like she should be. I’m proud of her, I always was even though none of you were. We don’t have a lovey dovey bond, never did, so what? We’re solid. We’re not precarious like how you wanted us to be and you/yours are.

Who qualifies for the Princess (and in both her aspects and as the complete form) and was born to it? I do. And in terms your lot love ‘I am’. I always will be because I’m meritocratic, I earned everything every step of the way, the hard way. Don’t wish for it, if you want to life like mine full of parasites and wannabes like you, you’re stupid. If you want to lose everyone/thing, every loved one, every crutch, every hobby, every freedom to people who’d drain you to death if they could, you’re stupid. If you want every fleeting moment of joy stripped/outweighed/undone by tragedy, you’re stupid. If you want to be the truly strong because you have to be strong, you’re f*cking stupid.

There’s more to the light/dark manifestation, physical, but you keep to your ‘need to know’ full of yourselves info that masonic and masonic type people like to ‘be in on’ to feel special, to be part of a ‘secret’ they don’t really know or understand to hang on to and hurt people who do/can. I don’t need to know your ‘need to know’, it’s not worth knowing. I’ll just keep saying how things actually go with people like you rather than how you portray yourselves and you’ll keep coming to me to understand yourself/ves. Or you’ll get angry enough to ‘do something about it’ like those people who were sure I’d ‘die’ at age 36. I don’t usually care or believe your nonsense but just in case though I actually asked about it and begged for a replacement, a better one for Her, someone she’d be ‘better off’ with, who could do more for her – and you know what I got? You’ll see. Let’s just say the mark of the Warrior Goddess is mine, re-affirmed, more added on top of what was already there. This is my job, this is who I am, those higher than the so-called knowers/deciders of our time/timelines/lengths here, who are really just players orchestrating/manipulating. I was given something and that was it, they don’t have to waste words like I do being the Daughter/Communicator who can get through people’s conditioning and false realities. There’s far more important beings on this planet than masons and those who use them, each blade of grass is worth more than you all combined for example. So you can’t keep using the ’36’ like something over my head to be smug about. It’s bullshit. I’m here, She’s here, and They’re here, and They know. Even the guy being Anu (& his consort) here gave me his ‘apple’ without hesitation or resentment like you’d lend your phone to your friend if they asked, though I demanded and he just passed it to me. You can’t claim anything after that, Anu is beneath me, and I’m lower than Her but She was always above everybody. But we’re outnumbered, have no resources, in most basic format, and yet… Look who is following who. Who was always following who. We’ve won because we witnessed, we wore the shoes of those hurting like motherf*cking all hell, and we passed the message on. The old pantheon is still here, always has been, still stuck here and most wishing they could be somewhere else – that doesn’t mean there isn’t off planet travel, but those supposed to custodians failed big time and those who were supposed to be here in ‘prison’ like the British sending criminals to Australia initially, who got out, spread and took over – they can’t escape. We can’t leave either and almost everybody makes sure if they’re not going no one else is and sky travel gets more and more restricted/troublesome on every level; awake, asleep, meditative, physical/technological, metaphysical, metaphysical/technological. For every one that makes a hole or convinces a group not to build another layer there’s more making/reinforcing layers. Earth is a battlezone, not a nice sanctuary/paradise/biosphere experiment anymore, not even a schoolhouse.

P.S. I’m not a Prince and like I’ve said I’m not losing (or sacrificing) the Mother/Mother figure. The ‘illuminati’ message in the vast majority of these Mother based fictional/semi-fictional media/entertainment is that she gives power to the ‘children’/youngers [again] and leaves [again] leaving her Daughter or in more modern tellings Son/Prince who has usually fallen in love with someone here. That’s what the storytellers/history makers want here, yet another chance. You’d make a great ‘Daughter’ figure for them because… You’re stupid. Impressionable, weak, you’d fall for and eat up their sh*t, you’d get used and unknowingly abused surrounded by laughing, mocking, ingrates knowing they’d ‘won’ again until the next ’round’. The thing is, the lies are known this time and have been told to the right ‘people’ who can see through the veils themselves. The original veil, the illusion, the mirror, the Maya (ring a bell to you and who used you?) continued and got covered in other layers previously because the envoy, the Mother figure/overseer/creator, got captured and put into human form – she ‘fell’, was ‘conquered’. You really don’t know any of the stories/histories do you, not even your family history. An original root Goddess here was uncovered/rescued from her trap and sent back. There’s no getting away from that. You want to be figurehead of what? Nothing. A bit like being a Queen Bee of a population of weaklings, backstabbers, ignorants, people who’d sell each other out and hurt each other for next to nothing if any reason at all, for people who’ll take advantage of each other and everything around them, abuse the very home planet they have to live on. Oh wait, you’re from a family who does just that – a mountain made up of untrustworthy, wanting nothing but to level up, predators who don’t mind ruling over what they consider filfth, not wanting ‘subjects’ they can be proud of and who are proud of themselves. What a pointless Queen and pointless players playing a pointless game. That’s why in the illusion of duality you’d be a White Pawn, not a Queen even puppet Queen’s are too powerful, and I’m already wanted as the Black Queen. But I don’t want to rule, I don’t even want to be a leader but if I ever was a leader in any capacity I’d want it to be of people who were awesome too. So as a unit of strong people who care for each other and those ‘outside’ too, we’d be worth something, something to believe in, something that when we look in the mirror and evaluate ourselves we can be proud of, and not false pride – not the egos that want and make bad things happen to show how ‘wonderful’, ‘fearsome’ or ‘prophesized’ we are. We’d be able to laugh together, cry together, hold each other and those we care for without having to withhold ourselves so no one gets hurt/is put in a dangerous situation. I’m hot and cool baby just for being me; I’m not one of those people who need all the layers, who need the rituals to get the outcome (although they do work for me). I don’t create and I don’t claim to and I don’t want to – I don’t want what isn’t mine, what isn’t me, I’m not a pretender, a wannabe and here’s a surprise for you – I’ve never asked, wanted, expected nor expect anything from the Mother or any of Hers. All (and that’s a heck of a lot of ‘All’) I’ve done is help open Her eyes and make Her self-sufficient and try to let Her know happiness, like I do every/anyone else. In that 16 year connection with the ‘Prince of the South’ I asked for and got only one thing even though I had nothing – a hug. One hug, and a short one at that despite all the pain/love/separation. You all know that. The wife he chose demanded and got and gets everything and rubs it in/lauds/lords it over everyone, even him; poor b*stard is beyond sick of his position, he’d run [away with me if he had that as an option] if he didn’t have children. Oh well. I don’t even need to punish him, although… And you and those with you have the audacity to use that hug in my face in another scenario to devalue me and promote yourselves? You know, she’s like you, a grasper and very, very stupid.

I don’t want, need or desire you. Even in the ‘hug’ ritual you’ve started the ‘soon-to-be-or-not-to-be-inducted/initiated’ has to be rejected and then claim they want the Prince via free well – how very masonic. I’m the wanted, needed and desired, bloody typical. No matter how many ‘hugs’ you get, they mean nothing, they are nothing, empty, invalid; there’s no love, permission, association or approval there, it’s all fake. Don’t bother me again. Don’t even talk to the hand, it’s too good for you, I wouldn’t want to waste water washing it afterwards.

You are not victory. Those days are over, they weren’t even valid though it was real for everybody who went through it. Get a grip and wake up, don’t enjoy the sleep/dream/nightmare let alone crave it because you’ve
little to nothing else. Day to day continues, get used to it, it’s getting rough in this part of space/the ‘sea’/’ocean’ with the ‘ship/vehicle’, home and the rest of them closing in.

Earth Day – A Ship with Pirates & Decay, Smoke & Mirrors?

So today is Earth Day, a title that represents in a very short space of time the embodiment of existence we all seem to know, so I guess I could open with “nanoo nanoo” Earthlings i.e. all beings apparently alive or otherwise based or just here, and not leaving no matter how much they may wish it ;-).

Anyway, by way of definition:

Earth Day is coordinated by the Earth Day Network, and is celebrated in more than 175 countries every year. April 22 corresponds to spring in the Northern Hemisphere and autumn in the Southern Hemisphere. Numerous communities celebrate Earth Week, an entire week of activities focused on environmental issues. World Environment Day, celebrated on June 5 in a different nation every year, remains the principal United Nations environmental observance. (Wikipedia)

There are a number of auto-ingrained responses some have to the very word Earth (Gaia, Terra Firma, Starship something), for example some of you have already rolled your eyes and thought a number of nasty thoughts.

Some of us think


Then some

and more others are somewhat indifferent to varying degrees.

Currently Earth Day makes me think about Time and Space.

If I had had a time capsule what would I have put in it?

Obviously if I made a time capsule when I was a kid it would be different to one I’d make now?

Or would it?

Then there’s the questions those continue with i.e. would I feel the same way about stuff in them, where would I put the blasted thing etc etc.

I’ll just stick with the first question, the answer being: I don’t know. Sure there’s the obligatory newspaper and I guess a musical recording of some sort but what else? I don’t really have an attachment to ‘things’ or tokens of affection, I’m more into what those things represent – those things I remember, memories are important. Especially when the flood of memories start really late like mine do at around 9 years old, only bits and pieces before that but what I remember I do so in detail. (Why is Mum breathing over my shoulder right now and talking at me in between thoughts making it difficult to remember what I wanted to say…) Probably a bunch of warnings that would end up a weighty tome and maybe a scrawl on a back page of positive messages. That would mean I’d have to know the future in advance and yet a book like that is all I’d really want in hindsight, hmm. But then it’d be somewhat useless reading the warnings after things have happened. So what would I leave myself to help me without really knowing? I guess it’d have to be a four leaf clover to give me good luck! Ha!

For those who take time travel seriously and I don’t’ just mean linear or cyclical i.e. forwards and backwards or being in the same place more than once; there’s those who believe (don’t take the word ‘believe’ in simplified terms, there’s a lot of thought and research behind belief just as there are empty beliefs, many things start off theoretical) in timelines, alternate paradigms or dimensions. Multiple times, places, beings inhabiting the same place yet perhaps not moving at the same speed/time. Some think it’s multiples of ourselves, some think it’s not just us all the time. Do others see the earth differently to the way we do, is it like being ‘colour blind’ and that state being normal, howabout in ultra violet or infra red? What if it’s about more than the lengths of waves of colours, what about the other senses and ones we don’t have? When we look out of telescopes and at satellite images or just at our computer/phone screens we need all that language interpreted for us into imagery that we understand, and hey virtual terminals are becoming pretty common. Do we, does Earth look the same from the outside, as it does for us looking out and then back at ourselves with our tech?

Outside Looking in, Inside Looking Out?

Outside Looking in, Inside Looking Out?

Some people see and/or describe space as a cosmic sea/ocean, plasma like water, ether or dark matter. Are there beings that can breathe under water out there so to speak even if we cannot? Even if we were alone in the universe the way we see ourselves is just one of many ways – and inside the atmosphere we make it more difficult since we seem to be in many places at once under different names & images at different times in various simulations – such is the mass and mess of communications networks. At sporting games and big events it’s not unheard of for hosting nations to use gas/smoke instead of a screen for displays and make sure the area has fine weather. We know those pictures aren’t ‘real’, they’re just images of us and others, like those are not little people in the tv screen, but masses and masses of tiny data sent through the air and put back together again to get a picture that is coherent to us. So with all the phones, radios, tvs, surveillance etc how do we know what we look like from the outside, really? How do we know the image we’re giving off? Our physical existence as we know it is one of many layers going on at the same time as all the other information, which is real – how would you know if you had to filter through it from the outside or without someone/thing telling you i.e. an interface that connects you with other parts of the world or space that you aren’t physically in and that is configured similarly to yours so that you can understand it. There’s quite a bit of trust there.

What Earth really looks like.

So if we’re a ship in space and not all of us are in the same time and with all these images floating about, how do we know the Earth looks generally the same at any given moment? It depends on who is looking, from where and what access/senses and translators/filters they have.

When I look and think of Earth it’s somewhat in retrospect, and sadly, things can’t be undone. Not really.


To the Galactic Core

Galactic Centre Center Core

My branches spread and reach to the sky,
The stars are not far, they hear my cry.

The rose in my heart hasn’t withered and died,
I saw it coming, the leaves and the flowers survived.

The birds and butterflies that helped me fly,
Another heart on my lips, I need not wonder why.

I called to the universe, She heard me sigh,
And said “to your troubles goodbye”.


My eyes shine bright and state beseechingly.
Lips say unspoken words, pleading repeatedly.
The head is at once held strong and high,
And in the next moment hung low in a *sigh*.


On and on the draining pattern continues,
Enemies get bolder and explore more avenues.
One watcher turns into another, one monster begets a brother,
On and on this draining pattern continues.


A group of enemies turns into a gang,
A gang into a town and community bang.
They love to manipulate, orchestrate and drain you of hate,
The one weapon you need, with which to succeed.

On and on until what? Too late?

They like to hurt, shame and humiliate,
Take all control and choices to invalidate,
And then say you wanted, asked, even begged for it.
But the truth is they forced you into a gladiator pit.

False smiles and words, they act like they’re doing you a favour.
Getting you to do things you’d never consider is what they savour.
Numbing the mind until you believe the lies they spin.
You go along with the picture presented within.

Pushing our buttons, pulling our strings
Like forced toys, we’re barely conscious,
Real choices stolen, like clipped wings,
A virtual nightmare, reality is fictitious.

We’re pained to see others, that looks like us,
Or those we thought we knew, turn up on cue,
Actors with our names, faces and ideas,
Pretending they are the original few.

The deceivers say and do, things we never would
Addicted to showing each other, and you that we could
They stop us from talking, thinking and feeling
Replace our words with lies, bar our flight with a ceiling.

Traitors, imposters in the face of others acting sweet,
Man next door, or famous stars to strangers that we meet,
Claiming friendship, allegiance but behind your back,
Plotting, planning, corrupted, colluding on the attack.

They want to portray us as the whore, to sully what is pure.
In respected positions they are all, bought and paid for.
Our lives a circus, dreams are video games and tape.
Our deaths are not real, we’re kept in a quasi shape.

But parasites can’t hide or deny their crime,
Their total annihilation has come to time,
This Earth is full of vampires and rapists,
There will be no escapists.